Month: September 2021

Don’t bother thinking that you’ve got the upper hand!!

Truly loving someone isn’t about WHAT they are. It’s about the way they treat me. I do not give a damn about who thinks less of people with disabilities or otherwise. If you’ve ever gave them a chance like I do, then who are you to judge about who they hang out with. I know you think that I don’t trust you. You’re right. Because telling me that I’m ready to make love to you, even if I DON’T feel ready to, is as though you’re saying that you believe in rape. This has really unsettled me ever since the day you said it to me. I’d honestly rather have a true solid relationship with someone who is genuinely interested in me and has a kind heart. That isn’t really too much to ask. Yet according to society I should only want someone who is muscly yet anorexic, a total gym bunny, a complete god. But what have YOU got to offer me that would touch my heart? Probably just sex, if I’m being honest. You’re cocky attitude is quite off-putting. I have no time for it. So before you think that being all masculine impresses me, well maybe it doesn’t. It’s the media brain-washing you into thinking that you can have your cake and eat it just because tv makes it seem that way. I just can’t lower myself to your standards. I wish you well in finding someone to be yours in the future, but I doubt any woman will stay with you long enough to be. I know I’ve always been a quiet private person who keeps herself to herself. Maybe I’m looking for a male version of that. Yet me being a private person doesn’t mean I will tolerate a man who only wants me for that three-letter word beginning with S. I might have aspergers but I’m certainly more intelligent than your pathetic one-liners. In one ear and out of the other I’m guessing. I’d rather be with someone who knows both their own worth and my worth. And if looks are what drives people these days, then go for it, as I’d rather be treat with warmth and kindness as I’m so fed up of image-obssessed men. I don’t really care for these model-type men. I only care that I’m with a man who has a heart of gold. Whoever or wherever that person even is. *sigh*. I do get the feeling that I’ll never find him. I’m destined to be single for the rest of my life. Not a nice thought but what am I supposed to do? I’m not going to sit around and wait for you. I need a lad who wants me as a whole. And not just for my body or for my looks. A true heart these days IS hard to find.

I remembered

All the things you said,

All the things she said.

How and where …

May you drown in my tears like I drowned in yours, except I swam right through..

You talk about hope?

I guess, I wasnt as “delicate” because if I was, you would have protected me instead..

I hope it was worth it all, for your sake.

I was always okay with halves, half truths , half times.. while you’re both somewhere whole..

Thank you for the memories.

The relationship between a girl and her stylist is a special one…

Dear former hairstylist,

I can’t believe how incredibly unhelpful you were when I asked for a referral to a stylist while you were on leave. You cut and colored my hair for 16 years and gave no notice that you were taking an extended leave of absence. I had to get my hair done as I had over an inch of regrowth, and it didn’t look terrific. But no, you took 3 days to return my text and said you couldn’t recommend anyone. Well, bitch, I jumped on your Insta and found 7 salons in under 10 minutes, so what the hell?

I’ve spent fucking thousands of dollars over 16 years, and you can’t refer me for a “one-off” appointment. WTF. You are a selfish piece of garbage! After reading some negative online reviews about your skills, I consider this to be a good thing. Go pound sand, you selfish bitch, my money won’t be enriching your life so fuck off!