Some friend YOU are.

Yes I did enjoy myself those two weekends that we spent together, but you don’t really seem to show much interest in having me around. If that’s truly the case, then there was no need to use me or ask me for my phone number. I don’t like being used. I must have only been useful for you those two weekends, cos screw it about how we treat each other in the future. I feel so used by you. That isn’t being a decent friend or looking after me. You aren’t as credible as you think you are. Just because I told you that I enjoyed my time with you, it doesn’t mean that I will always think of you as the last decent lad left on earth. What if I end up meeting a lad who pays me more attention who treats me with more respect? You’ve got competition until you can prove me wrong that you do actually “care” about me and my feelings. Being a decent person to me, doesn’t mean leaving me to my own devices when I’m depressed or going to harm myself, oh but when YOU’RE in hospital or harmed yourself, well then I have to care why? From where I’m standing you only really care about how you yourself is feeling. Screw ME. I’m just another person you ignore because you’re so selfish. Either be true with me or leave me alone, because you don’t want to end your “unique bond” with me. Or do you? The ball is in your court. It’s up to you to pick it up. Only you can decide how you treat me in the future, if I even ever end up hearing from you anymore. What’s the point in asking me for my phone number if you only text me every now and again. That isn’t being a good friend. If you don’t like to hang around with me, then leave me alone. Why DID you ask me for my phone number? For laughs? It certainly feels like it. Oh and those planned “Projects” that we discussed working on with each other, well I’ve still heard nothing from you about them. I’m tired of being ignored by you. If you don’t want to stay in touch with me, then please go away. I don’t have to have time for your crap. Let other lads treat me with respect. At least they’re more capable of it. Why would you even care? You don’t realize what a true person you have lost by neglecting me. That is mean ENOUGH. You expect me to reach out to you, yet you never reach out to me at all. It’s just strange. I can’t work that out. Anyway, get on with it. I know who I WON’T be buying a christmas card for. And don’t bother inviting me to any of your birthdays, as it might take a while for me to even think about relying on you ever again. You just carry on getting all of the attention that you crave. Don’t mind little me.

Advice for any guys here…

If the girl you want ever calls the police on you then immediately RUN! Give up on her. She’s not worth it! She just broke the trust and unspoken contract you had. It’s impossible to trust someone again after a betrayal like that… but believe me! There’s plenty of fish in the sea…

I would absolutely never date or marry a girl who would resort to calling the police on someone who loves her. That’s despicable and disgusting.

Love goes hand in hand with trust and if you can’t trust… then you can’t love. Unfortunately I lost the ability the trust anyone years ago….

Everything happens for a reason but true love is one in a million…. I’m not really sure I believe in love anymore anyway… everything is just a fucked up illusion.

Never let anyone try to lower your self esteem either. Toxic girls try to do this in relationships to make you more whipped and beta.

Your real love is out there and she won’t call the police on you, she won’t cheat on you, and she won’t be a complete bitch. Never settle for anything less. Stay optimistic and good things will happen. Don’t “simp over these hoes” like the kids say now lol… best of luck to everyone. I hope we all get what we’re searching for…

I wish you still felt worth it to me.

Even just in friendship. Having someone to talk to like this was interesting and fun, until it wasn’t.

You know, the last time I found myself in an abusive relationship, our mutual friends were taken aback that I didn’t say anything to them about it until he (a “friendship,” long story) had been gone for over a year. I told them that since he hadn’t been that way toward any of them that I didn’t want it to affect the way anyone else saw him. They still wished I had been more transparent. They were good people. Still are. But I will never be that transparent with others.

With you, it went from fun to something much less so; the following year reflective of the maladjustments I’d assumed over the previous two. No, you weren’t abusive. She was. But I never told you that, and then you insisted that I keep a friendship with her so that you could be comfortable around *me.* You know how sometimes reading it rather than just thinking it can reveal a “new” dimension of ridiculous? I think this might be one of those things. Unless you knew she was abusive and still insisted that one friendship was necessary to make another one work—I’m not gonna waste the amount of indulgence in negativity it takes to describe a person who does that.

But I figured it out and let go. And then I got really happy. But I never had to become happy for everyone else’s bullshit, of which only I or a few with me among them would be privy to, to be safe with me. I just want you to know that I’m actually happy. She makes me happy, but I became content before I met her … and I think it’s *why* I met her.

Please take care of the people who open up to you more sparingly, because they aren’t really hiding anything. It’s easy to confess; it’s much less easy to not spread negativity around like an infectious disease. And it’s nearly impossible to see what others aren’t doing to keep you safe. We’re all better off only speaking kindly of our exes. But some will never be candidates for continued friendship.

Smoke em if you got em

If you’re single and not going out a few times a week for random hookups, or have a few booty calls on speed dial, then by the laws of society you’re a fucking loser. It’s pretty dumb if you ask me, being single is hard enough without additional pressures. Like I’m sure the majority of single people don’t want to be alone, even if they bs on and on about how empowered they feel. Who wouldn’t want the intimacy and passion that you can only find consistently in an actual relationship?

For that very reason, I imagine a lot of people settle, more or less. I know that for myself, for as long as I can remember, every girl that I’ve had a mutual attraction had some kind of significant other already. Honestly, I hate it, but I get it. If you have people, probably every single day, blowing up your dms or whatever the kids say nowadays, why not just perpetually be in a relationship til you find someone you like more, break up with the first person, rinse and repeat. And then maybe you meet someone like me, and you’re like “you’re a really great guy, but I’m in a relationship”. Which is dangerous, because if you’re pretty certain the person really likes you, then what they’re really saying is “you have to prove your worth and dedication to me before I give up what I’ve already got going”, but if you’re wrong then you end up being some creepy harasser. I’ve literally had only one serious relationship, and surprise surprise she was dating one of my friends the night we met. A week later we hooked up, the next day she broke things off with my friend, and we had a multi year relationship after that. I still feel shitty to this day about how I betrayed him, but hey I would’ve never had a proper gf to this day if I hadn’t, and at least she didn’t have to even spend one hour being single. Since then I’ve tended to just drop it when I get the “I’m already in a relationship” line. But I’ve realized I will always be alone otherwise, as anyone I’m ever attracted to will always have been swooped up by someone who had the privilege of meeting them first, as though thats what all your bullshit Disney stories taught you.