Sometimes, I feel guilty for being depressed. The way I seem to rot in bed for countless seconds. It’s hard to talk to people when I spent my entire life questioning; Questioning how people could treat a little kid so badly, where I should belong, and why don’t I understand myself. I’ve never had a proper identity. I get how these days now there’s a lot of gender questioning, and it seems like I’m one of those people. I just want to get to know myself. To my partner, I’m sorry I’m not a perfect partner —and I mean this in a sincere way. These aren’t excuses for why I stay depressed. More than anything in this life I want to pursue my hobbies and enjoy life, but that’s difficult to do with that little voice in my head. I’m as strong as I can be right now. I’ll be slightly stronger tomorrow.