My illusion and delusion

Waiting, yearning for you to make a move but silence, silence is my only true friend. He greets me and embraces me more than a lover because you don’t want to make a move. This is the place where you belong, beside me, as I belong beside you. Maybe you don’t want to ruin our friendship but it never was, was it. We have always loved each other always, me more than you. I have let the lantern burn inside me hoping you would make a move towards me. But no, you’ve been all around spreading your spirit thin to a point were I only saw a shadow of you. Burned, burned it did inside me until it drove me crazy. Burned , burned it did until it almost destroyed me and destroyed you. I don’t want to go back there. I have never felt so much desperation and agony at the thought of you belonging to someone else. Maybe someway, somehow we developed a soul tie, I don’t know. The tug at it almost killed me and no one knew how to help me. Crazy that’s how I felt. The thought of losing our connection, overtaken by something that I could not understand. An agony and a death akin to the one I