Love story

A while back, an older couple told me how they got together. They had gone to the same high school, and while the man had a crush on the woman then, he wasn’t anywhere near her radar. They reunited many years later at, well, a reunion. They had both been married; the woman had gone through an acrimonious divorce while the man had lost his wife to cancer. They started dating soon after and eventually got married. And while this wonderfully romantic tale of love winning above all no matter how old you are was being spun, I couldn’t help but see the slightest tinge of ‘I loved her 50 years ago, I wish she realized that before I was her last best option’ in the man’ face. Not even half his age, but with more than my share of potential romances that didn’t appreciate me until long after it mattered, I understood this type of love story was probably the best I could ever hope for myself.

Biology

I’m certainly no expert. But as far as I understand, human sexuality is mostly based on biology. For instance, women are naturally attracted to tall men with big muscles, so that they can defend them against wooly mammoth and sabretooth attacks. Likewise, men are attracted to women with large breasts, because they have more milk in them. Cleopatra and Aaron Burr, among many others, all reached great heights due primarily to that extra milk they received as infants. It’s just science.

All that to say, when you asked me what my favorite part of you was, I went to the science. The single biggest biological attraction for men to women is waist to hip ratio. Not to difficult to figure out why. So, I guess that’s my answer. But not for that reason. You see, I think of that more as where my hands go. When we first danced in high school at the prom. The first time I kissed you. When we make love in pretty much any position. That’s just where they go.

Dear Panda Express Girl

Dear Panda Express Girl,

I want to apologize for my behavior on Saturday night. I have mood swings when my blood sugar is low, so I’m truly sorry for the harsh way I treated you.

Also, the mask requirement is very tiresome because masks are no longer required in California, so in a way, Panda Express is directly disobeying a mandate from Governor Newsome.

Masks or not, I am sorry for the harsh way I treated you when I asked for a bowl with white rice and an entree.

Regards,
That Diabetic Lady

The GoT

I don’t really know what to say. I feel weighed down by your judgment and expectations. But I don’t need you to be disappointed in me or motivate me. I just need you to be there for me. And you’ve rarely ever shown you’re willing to do that. Those times you’re irritated I haven’t told you how awesome you are or how sexy you are and how much I want you often and/or recently enough, maybe I was grappling with the most important time in my life. If you took any time at all, pretty much ever, to really get to know me, maybe you would understand that. But it’s not a matter of fault, it’s a matter of reality. And believe me, everything is VERY real for me right now. So, “given all the surrounding circumstances”, maybe you can cut me a little slack. Or not. What I have to do has to be done either way, and likewise I know I’ll be doing it alone like always.

I wish …

I wish that you still loved me. I wish you weren’t afraid to show me love when it mattered most. I wish you never betrayed me and broke my heart.

You made it easy to let go. I contemplate death often… I feel like I’m ready to die. Yes, I’m depressed..

You have no idea what you mean to me. You have no idea how much I miss you.. how much I care… I love you. But you don’t need me, you don’t want me. You said you hated me and I’ll always remember that.

Crazy how I was so invested in you… love does crazy things to people. I’m glad I’m free from your toxic ways. My heart aches for you sometimes but I miss the girl I fell in love with, not the woman you’ve become. You certainly changed. You probably do deserve better than me but I probably deserve better than you too.

I wish you the best in life, I really do. You were kind of there for me when no one else was… thanks for that. Maybe we’ll be together in another life.

I’ll keep you in my thoughts and in my heart but I won’t linger on what’s lost too much… I gave up on you years ago.

I hope your new man is treating you right and doesn’t cheat on you. He doesn’t love you like I do…that’s for sure.

Bye. We had fun while it lasted but none of it was ever real.

Daddy went crazy at the Hyroops Big and Tall

For weeks I’ve watched you from afar, your golden hair, your perfect tan, your rock-hard abs and pecs. But last night you made an appearance in my dreams for the first time. I was at a coffee shop, minding my own business, when I overheard your voice saying “Rexine, look, I brought you a mug of hot chocolate.”

To: O

It’s been nearly 6 years now and my *secret* feelings for you still haven’t changed. Sometimes I feel that you feel the same as I do (wishful thinking?), but other times I feel you pulling away. It’s almost like you don’t allow yourself to get too close. I don’t blame you at all though.
However, it’s all very confusing for me and I don’t wish to carry on like this forever – I cannot. The pining and the longing of the years gone by I don’t wish to repeat. But each time I endeavour to forget you, my resolves weaken when I see you,or talk to you.

What on earth are you doing to me? I just feel as if I’m under your spell.