The other day

The other day, I hear a banging going on next door from the place that used to be Sean and Tanyas. Since they moved out, a young family of three with a small son move in. I don’t interact with them much but as we share a garage that my living room sits over I often see and hear them late in the night often with the boy who is sometimes very upset . I can’t help but imagine something nefarious happening and I hope that if it is that the boy has the protection he needs.

Last night, an ambulance and a firetrucks bright lights illuminate the front of our unit as responders are instructed to go around the corner to that young families unit. We peer down from the balcony along with the ma across the lot from us to see what’s happening.
After the ambulance and firetruck depart a small crowd forms under my bedroom window on their phones or crying in Spanish.
It’s not until today until we learn from Matt who is right next to them that the husband died. Matt tells us the guy offered him some Coke a few nights before but they said no and he thinks that’s what caused the overdose.. word on the street is there’s a big increase of deaths from that stuff being laced with fentanyl.
The wife pack up and left sometime in the early morning. Matt is torn up about it as he often interacted with the guy.

Strange happenings in these parts.

21 year friends and nothing more

Dear Jay,
You asked me once, why we never went out?
I told you I didn’t know, when actually, I did. We never went out because you never asked…because we met in February and you left in June. I thought you’d come back for me. .. I mean if it was meant to be. I silently hoped it, never acknowledged it. The first time I laid eyes on you, I thought, “Is that my husband?” … I’m not even sure I told anyone that. We became friends and nothing more. What’s funny is I went on to date someone, and I didn’t tell you. When you found out, you asked me why I didn’t tell you? You were genuinely happy and curious. I think it was a subconscious decision. Really didn’t think that until you asked. What’s funny is, several people through the years thought we would end up together. When they brought it up, I vehemently denied the possibility. When you got married, my heart sank when I received the news from our mutual friend. When your wife emailed a picture of you two on the beach, prominently displaying her ring, from your account with no accompanying words, I think the idea of us being a couple had crossed her mind, as well. After you got divorced, I thought, what if we just decided on our 40s to be together. I met you at 22. You visited me a couple of times. Our relationship has remained platonic. One time, we went to eat and you sat next to me, and laid your head on my shoulder. I didn’t know what to do, nor what to say. I just sat there in quiet shock and wonderment. It was a little brief, but prolonged at the same time. I know that makes no sense. I mean it was long enough for me to think about it, but short enough for me to do absolutely nothing about it. I’m not even sure I love you. I feel as though I could be all you need a wife to be. Loving, caring, supportive, gentle, your safe place. I think I’ve stifled any emotion for you from the start, because I never wanted to misstep. I was waiting for you, the man to “find” me… then you find someone else, and sometimes, I hear and see things that would suggest you’re not over that. I could be wrong. Anyway, I just wanted to write this out. I’ve always loved you as my friend. I’ve always wanted you to succeed and know I’m in your corner. Now as I close this, I feel like I can love you, romantically.