Your Mind

It intrigues me. I just really wish you would have told me that was what was going on. I spent so many years hiding from this. Not acknowledging every time some random dream or event or overstimulation occurred. I shut down when people would address it occurring. I shoved it under a rug and threw the rug in a closet and prayed it would stop happening. I just decided to wear sunglasses and withdrawal. I wasted time and money going to the freaking ear doctor countless times and even made him place a tube in my ear because I wanted it to stop.

You are like me ….that’s why when I asked you about working out as you sat there smoking….your explanation was you had to balance it out. The good and the bad. I laughed because it’s a pretty dumb thing to say but ….to me I understood.

What the actual fuck

What am I supposed to do with this knowledge and how do I control when it happens? I am exhausted. I want to be normal.

Sincerely Britney

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