Every day I get up and get on the computer and print out a fresh set of documents relating to my business. Some have charts, some have graphs, but all of them are important business documents that I need to conduct my business transactions. You think I’m a workaholic just because I was at the office until late and forgot your birthday dinner? Well excuse me for living! Where do you think the money to pay for that birthday dinner comes from? That’s right, it comes from me and my business documents. Of course I love you, you’re my wife for a reason – because we fell in love and got married. But you have got to get off my case about how much time I’m spending with my business documents.
Being defensive when listening to a spouses hurt or concerns is a predictor of divorce. Forgetting is now not your wifes’ problem – it’s the fact you are so defensive when she tells you she is hurt by you forgetting a special day. You need to read the 4 horsemen by gottman, because you are heading for a divorce and all those papers are going to multiply. It may not be this year – she could hang in there for years and years being unhappy that you don’t give a shit about her birthday nor do you care that it hurt her. The fact you are ANGRY because she is hurt shows a lack of empathy and maturity. You show someone enough times they don’t matter and nor do their feelings – they leave.
I hope she gets a job and starts doing the same to you. No man or woman has ever on their deathbed wished they’d spent more time at work. I was married to a workaholic and he missed so much – he had the most fantastic, engaging, funny and gorgeous kids and a beautiful wife – who he ignored and found no joy in. Guess who gets ignored now? Get your priorities right – because chickens always come home to roost.