Damn it you compared it to a goddamn sprinkle in the spring
When it was a tsunami during hurricane season
It took houses down
It tore down the strongest cities
Me
I drove into fire, I collapsed into pieces inside myself, my DNA merging into yours, wrapping itself around the concept of death, I understood what it meant
You’ll die here, that was the promise, and I was okay with that
I let you have me like that
See me like that
Control me with a goddamn remote and I fell, fell flat on my fucking face, on ice, in skates that betrayed me
My writer’s mind, my poet’s eyes, buckled underneath me, underneath you, like I had never learned to walk
Mom always said it took me awhile to get on my feet
Guess it’ll take me a minute to get back on them
Been at sea
Been on the aftershock of lightning
I’m glad to have lived through it, but it may have killed me
(Could still kill me)
You made me forget I ever wanted to die, where I was
I took the wheel on acid
You made me fall in love with LSD, with you, all over again, and you can’t say we didn’t
Outside that super 8 motel
You gave me permission to end everything for myself
But no, it was when you stepped into home with me
You stole everything from me
Thief of days
It’s not like I can entirely blame you
But what?
What is it about me that scares you so much
I just don’t believe you or it hurts me too much to believe that you didn’t feel like that
But what else was that?
Hum. All these years…
Now it matters? Some triviality like nostalgia resembling feeling? Trip down memory lane not even good enough to even so much as directly reach out hey?
I haven’t forgotten you. My love was real. So what now? Perhaps the mood just took you and your poets mind danced along with it and by the time you see my response you’ll not only doubt it but be onto something else.
You didn’t see me, I was falling apart…