The Things I Wanted To Say To You In That Parking Lot

Dear You,

I still find myself replaying that Thursday morning in that parking lot in my head over and over. You have every right to never want to see or speak to me again. What I did was awful, inexcusable, and cruel.

I apologize for my actions.

I lied to you only because I thought that telling you the truth would only have led me into a spiral much deeper than I’d ever experienced. And, I thought you’d never understand. So I took your kindness and empathy for granted. But I know it still doesn’t matter 2.5 years later.

I fell for you because of your empathy and kindness. I fell for you because you sat with me during the beginning of this spiral and I thought if something bigger wasn’t happen, you wouldn’t take my spiral seriously. Now thinking back on it, it wasn’t your job to. I fell for you because it felt like you were the first one to really see me for more than just another person passing through. I fell for you because of the kind soul that you are.

I couldn’t tell you that then and I still can’t today.

I hope you’re happy now.

Best Regards,

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