This needs to be said. Sooner rather than later. I don’t want to hurt you by keeping this from you any longer and I certainly do not want to lead you on as I know this feeling and it tore me apart so bad.
I don’t love you.
Thank you for your love and attention. I appreciate it and I’m flattered so much and I’m sorry you mistook my kindness for romantic love towards you. Of course I love you. You’re my friend. But there isn’t anything else there. And there will never be. I am sorry to hurt you but its the way it is.
I can’t be friends with you at the moment. I’m not sure if we can be.
You drive me crazy. All i want to do is kiss you all day and be there with you. No words required. Just you and me listeing to each other’s hearts beat. I just want you to feel the same so so much. I love you more than anything in the world and I would do anything for you, anything at all. I’m mad about you and I just can’t stop thinking of you, every second of every day. Let me give everything to you, my whole life, all of me. I am here hurting, aching for you, You are my everything. I need to wrap you in my arms tight and never let you go. I am so very in love with you. I know its so crazy but I need you oh so very much and I love you. I know I do. And I also know I want to spend every second getting to know you.
Please don’t be so far away from me anymore. I really can’t take it much longer, if at all. Come to me. Come here where you belong, in my arms. I need you
It was almost a year ago I sent you a real letter. Didn’t help in the slightest. But it was a letter of apologies and meant for our destitution. You know I smoke lots. Because of you that is. I was not meant to hear about your problems on the first day of meeting you. I was very unstable later that week. My thoughts were. Finally I’ve found somebody. I was a 22 year old virgin male. It didn’t bother me. But know I know you’re problem which I believe to be just lies. Which entered my head when I was in hospital whilst I was delusional. She couldn’t do that stuff she spoke about. But I convinced myself I could stop you doing it. So I couldn’t talk to you . but believing stupid things I believed at the time if I have one smoke of a cigarette you will be fine. And I would be fine. I believed I could telepathically speak to you. Because what made me realise I loved you was all the obstacles you pit in my way. I wanted to secretly find away to stop the pain. I even told you that I loved you. And looked you in the eye. You must have seen the fear both my eyes Felt lost. Then I started to see things as they were. You’re very young. I’m rubbish at expressing my worries so I never said. I hope to God that you haven’t told anyone except maybe one or two close people. I know you don’t love me. The last time I was over wasn’t fair. Oky so you have grown. But I saw no light in your eyes. Like you looked dead when you starred at me. On the first visit I saw something out of this world in you. I don’t know how to go on not knowing how you are living. I think you did know how beautiful you were and you convinced yourself you needed close company. Power trip you enjoy. Now I have had sex with four different girls. And I believe you were my soul mate. But no reply to a letter and yes you’re changing daily but I want to be informed. In your own time doesn’t mean when you are 18.
When you reach that pivotal age. I want nothing to do with you if you have decided not to acknowledge me.
I am friends with irena on FB. I saw pics of u together. I’m happy for u. I have morals now and I wouldn’t want u to cheat. So I’ll make it easy for u. I’ll step away. Guess our timing was never right. Real bummer.
Does it not BLOW your mind how fate, the universe, how, whatever you want to call it or put it down to. Finds a way to bring people that are ‘meant to be’, together ?!?
It does mine…everyday!