So every day its a step closer for him to leave. I am not ready to let go of him just because we are taking separate ways for four years. I am not a strong believer in long distance relationships but we have it all, we are perfect for each other or at least he is perfect for me. Im so not read to watch him leave and don’t even look back, it is so hard knowing he is the one leaving and Im the one left behind, I stay in the same place with the same people while he can meet any other girl who can be perfect for him as he is for me. Yes, I am so scared to watch him leave and the worst thing of all is I can’t do anything to stop him, he might not care about leaving me because I am not as important fro him as he is for me and he might get there and just forget about me and everything that have happened between us. I hope he remembers me when he gets there because even if he is a million miles away he is taking a piece of me, a very important one, my heart. I won’t wait for him, I need to move on somehow but all I can do now is trust fate will bring us back together.
Why do I still love you after all these years? Why can’t I forget and move on if we’re not meant to be together? If it’s so wrong, then why does it feel so right? Can somebody please tell me why?
We were best friends ever since my mother let me explore outside my backyard. I was around 4 at the time you were about 5. Everyday we explored new adventures being as happy as we could. Sleep overs, going to the store, sharing secrets, playing man hunt, being best friends. We started to get intimate but as far as you knew we were just being friendly. I know you wouldn’t accept my love seeing as we are both females. Even with you not knowing my feelings I was just happy to have you by my side. I was 13 you were 14. You were moving. You moved far away. I loved you. I love you. I keep in contact with you. I’m going to see you next summer. I still haven’t told you I love you. Hopefully I’ll get to tell you in person. I love you
You wished me well. You told me he was not a good person, but I didn’t believe you. Now finally I know what you mean. Sorry I doubted you. I should have known that you only ever wanted good things for me. You may be pompous and arrogant sometimes but I have to say, now that I look back, you were right about so many people. You do have that intuition. I hope we can rebuild our brides after so long, and I promise to pay more attention to your advice.
This is another night that I can’t fall asleep. I just can’t stop thinking about what could’ve happen between us. Its just like every single night that I can’t fall asleep but this time is different. This time is the night I can’t fall asleep because I know that when the sun comes up you will be gone. You are leaving town for college now and I just can’t handle the fact that after tomorrow we will go apart. I will miss you but somehow when you leave in that plane I will need to forget, not only about you but about us and what could’ve been. Maybe it will be hard, but maybe that is the only cure to my broken heart, leaving you behind. This way maybe after a while it won’t be another night where I won’t be able to close my eyes or another sleepless night.
*maybe we are destined to be together but just not now.