• To YOU

    by  • February 11, 2016 • 0 Comments

    Do you know what it’s like to have so much love/passion pent up for a person that your body literally aches,and longs for them? Look it’s not just about sex with me. What I’m talking about is Love so deep that it physically effects your physical being. Being away from that person makes your heart hurt. Your mind is so consumed with thoughts of the person, non stop, day to day activities become more,it is a desperate yell for help just to try and quiet the mind of that person. Every time you reach out to the person, the silence in return is like a vice grip being tightened around the heart! Thinking about being around that person makes your skin get hot flash and rapid heart beat! Laying in bed thinking about making Love to the person causes heavy breathing, rapid heart beat, aching so intense your hips can’t help but move! When you stand up to try and clear your mind, your light headed as if you’ve had been drinking but you haven’t. This person I’m talking about is YOU.
    Physically I can’t do this much longer!
    I have a feeling this is taking its toll on me!
    I know you have let me go already.
    You have made it clear you don’t want to communicate. I don’t know what your going through, you won’t tell me. Your not letting me be there for you. You walked away from us with no explanation. I’m starting to think the only way to get over you is to expose myself to others. I’ve had my chances. I passed them up becUse I was still feeling dedicated to you. I don’t know why I just do. But I don’t see why I keep hanging on to someone who won’t give me the time of day. I am accepting that you don’t want us anymore. It hurts but im a survivor. Maybe that’s what it’s going to take, getting out in the world again. I love you deeply but I’m also realizing you can’t make someone Love you back. I am tired of reaching out only to be ignored. I am always here for you always. But I need to finish healing, I’m probably way behind you in the healing area. For all I know you have moved on to another woman. I’m left with only what if. I wish you the happiness you seek. But now I have to focus on moving forward, don’t think it’s because I didn’t want to be with you anymore. You have forced my hand to have to move forward. I Love you enough to let you go! Because that’s what you’ve made clear you want.

    Love always,
    E

    True Story

    by  • February 10, 2016 • 2 Comments

    We had not been in touch for many moons and too many seasons.

    Year after year after year, whizzing, flying by.

    I missed and worried about you.

    It was this place I intended to leave a message for you.

    But this place sucked me in as I read and read and read.

    And read and read and read some more…

    The letters made me sad, they made me think.

    Authors writing letters hoping ‘the one’ will read them …

    Friends and lovers reading letters hoping the message ‘that’s for me, for sure’. …

    So I decided, what the heck, I write to you.

    And you answered.

    And I replied.

    And you replied.

    And I replied back.

    Thank you LINS!

    The truth

    by  • February 10, 2016 • 2 Comments

    While I know your words aren’t for me…I still hoped they were. But I know there not. I kept thinking some how it would all make sense but it doesn’t. If you love me you wouldn’t play games with me. I just want to apologize for being delusional. I would love to be loved by someone like you. Thats the truth. But the reality is lifes not a fairy tale and sometimes dreams don’t come true.

    None of this waits for approval from YOU

    by  • February 10, 2016 • 2 Comments

    I’m blocking you out.

    I’m going off the radar.

    I tried to connect, but it didn’t work out.

    Instead, I’m going inward.

    This is MY time for ME.

    I’m making my plan.

    I’m writing out what I’m all about.

    Then – I’m making it happen.

    I’m holding myself responsible, for myself by myself.

    I miss you. I’m sad. I’m lonely.

    Resources are limited, though.

    None of this waits for energy or approval from you.

    Everything I’ve got is gonna go into this change.

    FOCUS. This silence is for ME to FOCUS.

    Friendship Has Its Flaws

    by  • February 10, 2016 • 1 Comment

    In my 26 years of life I have realized that no friendship is perfect, because we are not a perfect species. You will hurt someone in the future, just as you have probably hurt someone in the past. It is inevitable, but whether it was on purpose or not is a matter of the heart.
    I want to tell you, that I will always be here for you, even if you aren’t for me. I don’t give up on friendships, I tend to stick like glue and try to give give give until there is nothing left to give. I wear my heart on my sleeve, this you know. I like you more than just a friend, but that’s hardly my fault. My heart just takes to kind, genuine people. I will never ask for more than you have to give, because there is no room for selfishness in a friendship or relationship of any kind.
    I get that I have to protect my heart, that is what I have always been terrible at doing, but I trust you. I want you to know that.
    I am not like most men who only see your physical body and attributes. I see you for who you are, and its only been a few months, but I can tell you are a wonderful young lady and have a great heart. I have a thing for genuine people who respect others, and you do.
    I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest, since sharing everything with you really isn’t an option right now because we are trying to just be friends, so here are my thoughts and I had to put them somewhere.

    -Your forever friend, no matter what.