After our talk this morning all I wanted to do was cry. So, on my way home I cried. But, I didn’t go home. I went to the park, the park we first sat at. I took out my notebook and started writing. Just to get the feelings out. But, my writing became angry. Not at you, not even at the situation, but, at the person our(mostly mine) actions made crazy. So, I flushed the writing. I don’t want to be mad at this person. They are only protecting you and themself. But, damnit you are an adult! And it hurts me to think I will never see you again.
Did we get to close to fast for their comfort? Maybe. Should we have been sneaking around? Probably not. But, are we not two grown ass adults who made these choices together? We are. And now it caught up to us. Oh well. I’m gonna get high and drink. I still got those edibles if you want them
with my legs. Pressing my lips on yours. My eyes closed. When I gently open my eyes after a long kiss you tell me how my eyes are glazed. I break into a small smile. I love looking at your eyes, was it it about them? I think they are deep and beautiful just like you.
I take gently take your hand and kiss your palm. You gasp. I love how your sensitive in that spot, it’s one of my favourite kisses for you. I let your hand cup one side of my face, loving its soothing touch. Loving how your hand is cradling me.
I was beginning to cry, a few tears were slowly forming in my eyes and now rolling down my cheeks. I had no idea why I was feeling like this. Was it because I was missing you? Or was I feeling overwhelmed by my emotions? Maybe both, I didn’t know.
I wonder sometimes, do some males get just as emotionally attached to females? Or do they have a different expression of their emotions? Is it an individual thing or universal? I often get very emotional when it comes to dating/relationships and when I ‘fall’ for someone. And I have only ever felt so strongly only about one person.
Sorry I couldn’t make this a happy post, but happiness doesn’t mean you can’t be sad right?
To m from p.
If you’ve decided to move on. I wont stand in your way.
Doesn’t change my feelings for you and I would completely understand.
This letter is for the people that set me up. I just wanted to post the truth how wicked this people are.
Before I post the letter I want to say I do believe in old fashion behavior and strong morals (doesnt mean I’m moses or something. But thats my believes). But I dont really care what other people do is not my business as long as there is “reasonable” behavior. Example: If men has a need and go out with the working girl, is not my problem. Another example: If the society allows dating and some people go and date and then broke up is not my problem. Is their problem before God not my problem. And I really dont care and I dont want to know. But example: Somebody come and try to take 50K usd from we. Thats a problem for me. Just to clarify where I stand on the issues.
I will start with Ile. Many time I said this guy is a whore. He has been with 200 girls (they are all NON working girls). I will tell you just one instance from the past. Ile and his friend “Bitch” (Thats how they call him “Bitch” I dont make this thing up promise). were working for my father. It was around 9pm I went to pick them up and bring them home. As we were driving we came to (i’m going to explain the exact location for people who live there to know. I will not post the google map) crossroad with street lights. I believe it is called the 3 towers place. Across it there is pharmacy where violeta boro daughter works, and there is butcher shop. Across the 3 towers and across the butcher shop towards BAJRO there is a building. As we are sitting at the street light, the “Bitch” start moving back and forward and start saying lets go up at this building there is a girl (from the conversation I had felling the girl is around 18-19 years old. It could have been 16-24 year not more then that. The guys were 30+). Her mother work night shift. We can go and work her. Maybe if she has friend she can call some other girls if not we work her alone. So think about it, the mother work her ass off all night. Some 30 year old guys come in you apartment and f**k you daughter brain out. I was just guiet. But I can see from the mouth of Ile some liquid start coming out. I mean they were pomp out. They have done it before for sure. I drop them home and went to study (I was studios person. The best in mathematics the best in physics in whole city. My lab partner at university was 10th in the world in physics competition. He was better then me but not by far).
Then I’m going to talk about Pece from Bistrica. I always said he is a p**y. His grandfather work for the fuier as a informer bringing people to concentration camps. So that guy had 16 year old girlfrind when he was 18. Her name was Gordana. I believe the place she lived was called new Brusnicko ili brisnicko. They had book account firm. Anyway Pece deflour her. He was ridding her for about 3 years I think. Sometimes i would go in the morning at his university apartment and Gordana would be there from last night. I dont blame pace. She Gordana had very nice rack. Probably he had so much fun all night. When the time come to marry her she dump her. The main reason was this : “Bety his sister married doctor. She was main in the family. And her phylosophy was that the family is very intellectual advance and Pece need to marry RICH girl” F**y Imbeciles . I would marry rural girl with NO education ANYTIME as long as she is a good girl. Even If I had PhD and/or I had 5 million dollars. Morons.
Then we are going to go to the “girl” Jane. Jane was recognized as a best student in the high school. He got that because his father was buddy buddy with all the professors. I was better then Jane in mathematics, physics, literature, history. (I just remember Pece was bringing feta cheese to Trpe mathematics professor to get strait A. What a peace of work) Any way Jane the girl, had girlfriend for 2-3 year. He also deflour her. When was time to marry her he dump. What a peace of garbage this people. Remember in this culture is kind of important if you were defloured or not. Except if you name is not “Pece, Ile , Jane”. Then is ok. I had a girlfriend when I was 19. I had sex with her 2 time. She was NOT a virgin. And they still wanted to kill me. I mean literately kill me. I dont understand. But hey I guess is their culture. By the way for the sex. Because it was my first time the first time when we had sex I just inserted the head and I was done on her stomach. The second time I lasted maybe 30 seconds. It was not really something you remember. Also the “girlfriend” would laugh at me after the sex. Calling me bad names when we were walking on the street (regarding the sexual intercourse). I mean she was a “golden”.
And let me finish with Goran from down under Australia. I mean this guy was really really really p**y. And really a whore. He had some friend in Australia. She was a girl. She promise him even she had a boyfriend she would give him at LEST blowj**b. Then back home he tried to have sex with his 1 or 2 causing. His cousin Pece from Dihovo was helping him. Then his other causing try to sleep with his sister snezana. Then in Australia when he brought his girlfriend back home his father was trying to see his gf panties. Then the roomer was that his father was sleeping with female students (he was professor). What a family.
Now I really understand why there was 15-20 people trying to kill me and still can not do it. I was more cleaver then them. Stronger then them. But I heard that mike tyson is strong. Or sir “Charles” is strong. They can bit shit out of me for sure. Just to give you idea guys how you can bit me up. Because you guy dont have something call “balls” to bit me up.
By the way shout out to Shone I thing was his name from Caribbean. Schoolmate. He bit me up quite a bit when we played basketball. Big black guy. I deserved that. I just want to give you respect. If we ever meet again I would be honeyed to treat you a beer and I really mean it.
Three was our inside saying to each other which meant I love you.. I still do please see this and text me or Facebook message me… If not at least I got it out somehow.. I hope your happy you deserve so much ..