• There

    by  • May 20, 2018 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 3 Comments

    Comes a time when one is forced to let go. You have forced my hand. I have to respect those wishes. I should have long ago when you cut contact. I know I’ve written letters before claiming to be done and moving on, but in truth I didn’t want to and wasn’t ready too. My life has become desolate and I haven’t been myself. I’m tired of no friends. I’m tired of not having someone to hang with. I hope to God that you haven’t hurt the way I’ve hurt trying to accept you don’t want anything to do with me anymore. Your the one that cut contact so I can’t help but think you were ready and prepared to let me go. It was an over night thing on my side and I never was given an explanation or say so about it. I’m tired of not being myself anymore. I just have to tell myself that if I had meant anything to you then you wouldn’t have been able to throw me away the way you did. Don’t get me wrong, you didn’t owe me explanation, especially if I didn’t mean anything to you. I get it. I fell deeper than you. I can except that. I get it. I do hope the two of you are happy. I will always hold you close to my heart. You are the most gorgeous woman in the world. Inside and out. I want to start being my lively self again. I hope you’re being loved with a love so great that they sweep you off your feet. I have accepted that and am ok with it. Sorry for causing you so much trouble. I don’t care how pathetic I look. Take it as a compliment. You are hard to get over. Your smart, gorgeous, loving and hard headed. Will I find another to sweep me off my feet the way you did? I don’t know if its possible. I hope so.

    From: me

    3 Responses to There

    1. PR
      May 20, 2018 at 5:56 pm

      I wonder if OP ever tried to talk to her in real life? If he ever gave her a chance by asking her out even once ? I wonder if OP ever initiated anything to her , instead of throwing random anonymous letters on websites?

      I would gauge someone’s interest and commitment by their actions, not just words. When someone really wants you, they want you, that’s it, there’s no doubt about it, no confusion, no hesitation. If I liked a guy and he showed no initiative I would think ‘he is not that into me’ and it’s time to distance myself from those feelings. He might like me, but not enough to take it any further than that. I’m not here play to games, I want things to be honest and wholesome.

      I hope this wasn’t the case with OP…

    2. A
      May 21, 2018 at 12:10 am

      Your cross my mind all too much lately, i never wanted to say goodbye it just sort of happen in a weird way that you didn’t say anything i didn’t say anything. I think of the times where i laid in your arms and felt absolutely safe. You were my knight, my evermore. And i hope one day you do reach out because i do miss you and what we had. I know its been awhile but time cannot put a pause of what we had.

    3. K
      May 23, 2018 at 11:42 am

      It’s very sad. Much miscommunication, lack of communication left room for decisions based on assumptions. You were left to assume. So was I. I tried to make sense of it, I tried to reach out, I don’t know if you really got that. I fell for you. I really did. Sadly, you were quite cruel to me and either you couldn’t see that or you just really didn’t want to. And now…well those hideous calls you made…you really scared me. I thought of a line from a Bob Dylan song earlier “Don’t know if I saw you if I would kiss or kill you.”

      Love isn’t a game. There’s no winners.

      Love is surrender. Like Zizek says it’s “assuming the mistake and going to the end.”

      Falling in love, well that’s falling, letting go, giving the ego a break, being. You wanted some label? But there’s no guarantees. It’s the risk you take. I was willing to take that risk the night I came back to you.

      But youre so so hard headed. It’s not without a heavy heart that I say bye bye baby, we coulda been grand.

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