• Pathos

    by  • March 17, 2018 • * Safe for Work *, Grief • 2 Comments

    From time to time I look back on how we became friends. Admittedly, there was an attraction on my end in the beginning. I loath the word “crush”, but so be it. But as time marched on, a pattern emerged. Turmoil defined our friendship. Though I never actually came right out with my life’s woes, I took comfort in our shared discomfort until I began to feel your pain. A graduation of sorts. It wasn’t until I knew It was something deeper that I wished it away.

    For a time.

    I cannot escape the weight of your pain even though you’ve clearly moved on. I am happy you want to be happy. I’m happier if you are happy. But I still carry your grief inside.

    I don’t want to hear that you love me nor need me in your life. But I sometimes wonder if you’re holding on to a piece of me that weighs heavily on your heart and if it hurts you the way it does me. And if that’s why you don’t reach out.

    2 Responses to Pathos

    1. best of luck
      March 18, 2018 at 11:38 am

      Author, how do you know that this person has ever really moved on? This is an anonymous website – so if this person has not made it clear to you in any other way, then maybe there is still hope. If you hurt this person or if you know that this person is in a lot of pain, then it might be wise for you to do the reaching out and try to make peace.

    2. Everything has a reason and
      March 23, 2018 at 11:02 am

      so my lengthy post just disappeared into the ether.

      Well, therefor just this much…

      I am holding on to a piece of you that weighs heavily on my heart and it hurts profoundly.

      So what are you going to do with this piece of information?

      Certainly you are not my source of pain but what if your person were to say this to you?

      Mine entered my life again, again just briefly as if to ensure himself that I haven’t changed and that this connection still remains.

      The why he contacted me again stays in the ether much like my original post – since it appears that his choices remain the same.

      There are things I don’t, and will never understand the kye is accepting that we don’t have to know everything.
      There are things that are out of my control, the key is accepting that there are always things that are out of our control.

      Happiness doens’t exsist without this particular pain or grief you are refering to.
      A sunrise is followed by a sunset as surely as mortality is not a choice but fact.
      there is beauty in all of it if one cares to see the truth with open eyes and dares to live with an open and volnurable heart anyway.

      Best wishes to you in finding your way and may regret never be a part of your choices.

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