• It really happened

    by  • December 30, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 8 Comments

    One thing that gives me validation in this connection between us, is when you saw the way I reacted like a startled rabbit. You responded, I heard you. And I now know what I felt, have been feeling, still feel and believe, is really true. It has never been my intention to persuade your decisions, but we both know what was felt… like you said, it keeps happening…Still

    8 Responses to It really happened

    1. Him
      December 31, 2017 at 6:12 pm

      Now only if we quit running from eachother

      • nah
        January 3, 2018 at 6:54 pm

        why does this resonate with you?

    2. Me
      December 31, 2017 at 11:11 pm

      Yup, it was really true, it IS really true, and it will ALWAYS be really true.
      The feelings I have for you are beyond intense.
      I love you, I wish I was with you.

      My decisions were fucked up. I wish I had made better ones.
      I hate to think of all the time I lost, I would rather think of the time I still have.
      I do not need you to persuade me, we just need to push the fear aside and start communicating.

      P.S. I did not really have to go to the bathroom, I just wanted an excuse to see your place and spend a couple extra minutes with you. And hoping, if the moment was right, I would have the opportunity to kiss you.

    3. so over this crap
      January 2, 2018 at 12:27 pm

      Feelings are just a roadmap to pain.

      And the walls go back up again.

      Not worth it.


      • ME
        January 2, 2018 at 7:36 pm

        I respect your decision, but why can’t you tell me to my face?
        Not sure if this is even you. 🙁

        • nah
          January 3, 2018 at 6:53 pm

          nope. i am a d. but you respond to me so often we must come from the same storyline.

      • noname
        January 3, 2018 at 11:07 am

        I was seldom so sure about what is worth it an what not. But I get your anger and frustration.

        • so over this crap
          January 5, 2018 at 5:04 pm

          Oh, did I sound angry and frustrated? I didn’t mean to.I simply meant to introduce a new way of thinking I am trying out.

          My reasoning is this: If a tree falls, and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? Similarly, if there is a connection felt, but you can’t talk about it, does it really exist?

          Connections are made everyday, but that doesn’t mean we should romanticize them.

          Besides, everything in life fades or dulls to eventual nothingness: Beauty, age, love, even our physical bodies. So what is even the point of a happiness that will see a definite end?

          I simply am choosing to not let myself fall into this rollercoaster ride as much as I can control. The ups and downs are enough to drive a person mad. I choose to stay neutral.

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