We’ve been friends for a few years now. You know me like the back of your hand – my flaws, my idiosyncrasies, my small habits – so it surprises me that you’re clueless to how I feel about you. I’ve tried so hard to get over you, but even when you gently and kindly rejected me after I confessed my feelings I still couldn’t get you out of my mind – and my heart. I don’t understand why it’s so difficult to not want you. I cry some nights because I want you so badly but I know I can’t have you. You confide in me like a lover, you flirt with me like a crush, we argue like an old married couple, and yet all I’ll ever be to you is another friend. I love you, and I’m sure you feel some way about me, but I know you’ll never feel as strongly for me as I do for you. Every time we’re alone I imagine that things could be different; that maybe we could be something more. I know it’d be chaos if we ever dated, but what if it wasn’t? My curiosity has been burning in my heart for the past 4 years and there is nothing I can do to sate it. Help me get over you, give me a reason to not love you. Because every day I fall more and more in love with you and it’s taking over everything I do.
I’m glad you’ll never see this. I just wish there was some other way to let you know.