It’s been a long time. I do think about you often, I still live with the regret of taking you for granted and loneliness has taught me a lot about life and helped me understand how I neglected our relationship.
I was stupid and young, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t love or care about you. Years after our breakup I still wish you nothing but happiness in your life because you do really deserve it. I beat myself for not trying harder, for not being what you need and do stuff that you truly deserved but were out of my reach.
I’ve been through a lot since then, important people in my life passed away and personal things that brought me down. I had no one, I felt so lost. You were and currently are the only one that pops up in my mind to talk to but I realize you’re not here anymore and it hurts.
I began to find any excuse to talk to you, any holiday or your birthday but I never got a reply from you, including the last time where I poured my heart out and still got nothing from you.
I heard from mutual friends that you’re doing great, but I can’t even look a picture of you without feeling a crack in my heart but the moments we had are enough to bring a smile to my face and keep moving on.. Specially our silly fights at bed where we discussed who loved each other more.. Years after seems like I won.
I think it’s time to move on and as you said I ended up learning a lot about myself and relationships in the process and I guess that the reason I still feel empty when it comes to us is because I never got a closure. I gave you one because you deserved to know how sorry I am and how much until today I still love you but you just got tired and your love for me just fade like every promise we made each other.
Bottom line, thank you. You deserve someone who can give you everything you want and need in life, things that I can’t afford or are out of my reach for a million reasons where I just wanted someone who can love me for who I am and what I can offer.. just unconditional love and support forever. I do wish you a great life and I hope you understand why we can’t ever be friends. Part of me will always love you no matter what. Take care and stay being what you fell in love with: A joyful kind-hearted beautiful woman.