• Best Friend?

    by  • October 11, 2017 • To You • 4 Comments

    To The One,

    You were so important to me in so many special ways and I am so fucking stupid for having believed your line of shit for so, so, so long. You had always been an oasis in my mind as I traveled through life, a love story never fully realized, a boys dream turned to a mans desire. All this and what have I learned??? Obviously not much if anything at all. What a court jester I must be for you, what an asshole I must be not to pick up on all the lies you have piled on me. I am so completely confused by all these revelations that I just need to quit this whole fucked up mess before it costs me everything I have. You don’t seem to have the capability to give an honest answer even if the true story is so fucking clear as to be laughable. All those dodged questions and evasive replies are equal to a string and a cat. Keep em jumping and wanting more while you enjoy the attention and I look like a grade “A” asshole. What fun. Your either innocent as a newborn without an ounce of manipulator in you or you are guilty as hell of all the above. I know your no innocent as I know your powers of manipulation. What the fuck? I deserve to be used like this? What the fuck did I ever do to you? Show love and desire and this is the end result? No more.
    Fuck this. As much as I feel you deserve a Fuck You Too, it goes against my every thought and memory. And thanks for that too, ruining every memory and poisoning each and every thought and emotion I had. This really sucks. Just one honest answer would have meant the world to me but you just could not pull it off. What a fucking shame. A 100% died in the wool fucking shame. Thanks for the thought.

    4 Responses to Best Friend?

    1. Me
      October 11, 2017 at 2:03 pm

      To K-
      I hope this is not from you to me…. While I do have the skills to mess with people, I am not manipulating or fucking with you. I do not do that to anyone. And when it comes to you, I am a child, a very scared child. I hoping this is not you because some of the statements do not make sense to me like:
      All of the lies (what lies, you never asked me anything I needed to lie about).
      Used like this (I don’t understand how I used you)
      Making people jump and enjoying the attention (I do not get a thrill from causing people pain or jumping thru hoops)
      I am hoping this is not you because if it is, I really somehow fucked up, miscommunicated, or something.



      It can’t be you…..could it?

    2. @ AliK
      October 12, 2017 at 12:06 am

      I have been reading following your love story with Miranda, which has ended in such anger and sadness, I do hope you both will find happiness.

    3. T.F.
      October 12, 2017 at 7:31 am

      that is how i feel for years also. I was truly in love for first time, and been used by it. I know i am not average or below average to be treated like that. I am cute enough to deserve the sexual attention and compliments , instead of watching on the side while the other gets pleasured and treated like guy as i pay the bills , bullshit.

      • Scabs have formed
        October 17, 2017 at 6:45 am

        While I appreciate all the shared pain none of this is about you guys. My one is just too fucking lazy and self absorbed to even dream this could be about her, that’s taking the leap that she even bothers to check back in here. So for all you sharing this feeling, I hope you find peace and dump your giver of pain as I have. She was poison to the system and probably always has been. Her marriage exploded and like a fool I risked mine, big fucking mistake folks. This is just me shouting into an empty space to vent. I just don’t fucking care anymore, whether she visits my thoughts or not. She is destined to be alone and for that someone is lucky. Like a cute vampire she will empty your heart.

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