• to my ghost

    by  • June 2, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 12 Comments

    For a long long time I was hoping that our stupid situation was nothing permanent. That we both were sorry and would laugh together in the end because finally love had won. I was hoping so much. I thought this feeling would never go away. And to be honest, deep down inside of me must be something left. Otherwise I probably wouldn’t write this here. But I can’t access it anymore as I used to. Without trying, without even wanting it, I realized just recently that I have finally moved on.

    12 Responses to to my ghost

    1. Same
      June 3, 2017 at 3:12 pm

      I’m not sure if this is a male speaker or female, but I feel this way towards a female:
      I used to think that she would be in my thoughts forever, but now that things are moving on in life in a positive light I start to think of her less. I used to think that I would never be attracted to anyone but her, but now, after Friday nights in the bar, I don’t feel the guilt anymore regarding meeting someone new. I try to access the memories and regret of the act of distortion that separated us, but even there I.. feel nothing, not sadness or happiness. It doesn’t scare me anymore of being afraid of moving on, compared to the thought that I will never meet someone like her again. Still feels like a ghost. A person that left an imprint, that is slowly fading, yet, I come on this site to read the comments, or posts of an initial that reminds me of her, yet are probably not her. I see posts with my initial that remind me of me, and would say things that I would say, but they are not me. Just people that feel the same loneliness, that I use to feel. Even if I were to say sorry for what happened in the past, it wouldn’t bring back the feelings of curiosity and excitement of first meeting her, as sweetness over time become bitter, till you can’t taste it all. I hope the person that ghosted you as well as me is at peace. I hope that you are at peace

      • S
        June 4, 2017 at 12:56 pm

        What’s your initial or name? Let her know you’re moving on

        • Why Can't You
          June 12, 2017 at 12:40 pm

          Read what words written in hope yet only leaving an initial when S asks for more as in a name. How about writing your name?

      • author
        June 5, 2017 at 4:44 pm

        Thank you for your kind words. You say what I think. I didn’t realize how bitterness slowly took over until I met someone who reminded me how special you could find our energy – thoughts I used to have in a more euphoric stage. What remains is doubt and the feeling that there was nothing real apart from weirdness. Yet the fog that clouds my memory is comforting. So I can say, yes, I’m at peace. I don’t know if they are or what they are and meanwhile I don’t really care to know anymore.

      • @ same on
        June 5, 2017 at 7:13 pm

        @same on. What you’ve said makes sense. I’ve been ghosted. It crushed me at first. Give it time and the pain eases as you accept they have moved on. They got what they wanted from you then moved on. We learn from things like this. It was the first ghosted situation that I’ve ever experienced. Still healing, but learning to live again. We may never know why ghosting happened. I couldn’t ever do it. People have their own reasons and lessons to learn. Us being ghosted is a part of that. I’m sure it wasn’t easy on them, but Im sure the ones ghosted get hurt the most because they had no say or warning about it. We can only blame ourselves. We put our selfsame vulnerability in the hands of a person that could do it……. Doesn’t make them bad people. It’s just their way of letting go.

        Best wishes

    2. Same
      June 5, 2017 at 2:04 pm

      Nvm, I’m lying to myself, I want you so fucking bad right, now. I don’t give a shit, if you don’t like me cursing, because it is real. I just want to be with you. Not out of fear, and not out of obligation, but because I want to. I loved the way you smiled at me,before the drama. I loved how I was looking at you, and seeing the most beautiful version of myself, I wanted to grow old with you, and i still do. I’m sick of writing on a site, that means you would never know my true feelings. sigh. if only you feel the same.

      • Run as fast as you can to her!
        September 16, 2017 at 6:58 pm

        Go to her. Don’t wait another minute. Seize the day.

      • You can Male it happen
        September 16, 2017 at 11:41 pm

        Go to her. Don’t give up. You know what you have with her. Go get her if you want her so bad. Don’t let fear mess with your heart.

    3. ether
      June 6, 2017 at 4:53 am


    4. M.e.
      June 7, 2017 at 10:28 pm


    5. BG
      June 8, 2017 at 7:34 pm

      MJP .. is this you?

    6. what are you waiting for?
      August 26, 2017 at 10:10 pm

      if you all were really over your other person – what are you doing here? Stop living in denial and being stubborn. Go to them and tell them you love them.

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