• Thoughts

    by  • May 14, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Wish • 1 Comment

    You’re the reason i have trust issues. You’re the reason I’ll never trust a man enough to marry him. You’re the reason I believe that everyone I am in a relationship with will never care for me like they should. I feel like all of the things that are fucked up in my head stem back to when i was with you. I feel like you did some damage to me. That you made me feel worthless. You took my voice. My ability to make choices for myself. You took my confidence. You took so much from me. And what did i get in return? I got emotional scars, irrational thoughts and fears, a mind crippling thought process. I have no diploma. I am a worthless piece of shit. You know what really bothers me though. The fact that i let every single thing happen the way it did. The fact that i became brainwashed  The fact that i worked hard while you drank my money away and lied to me. The fact that i gave up years of my life to be with you and make you happy and got shit on in the end. That you made me feel like it was all my fault. The fact that you called me crazy, a whore, a fat worthless bitch and i believed you and still do to this day. I can’t get these things out of my head. I don’t know how. I feel like you programmed me. And i hate myself for letting you. I have no clue who i am. Or who i was. I wish i could take all that back.  I wish i was strong enough back then. I wish i was strong enough now.

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    One Response to Thoughts

    1. "Jane"
      May 15, 2017 at 5:47 am

      I’m not someone who knows you, but please believe me when I tell you that you are none of that! I hope you one day find someone who shoes you that you are everything but that hateful BS he spewed. You are beautiful!

      I hope I made you feel like there’s hope.

      Sincerely,
      A broken girl




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