• Goodbye

    by  • April 20, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Sorry • 1 Comment

    I don’t know what drove me to think this way but for the past few weeks i have felt nothing but pure distress. I feel like everyone is laughing at me 24/7, i feel like they think im a fool and that they think im worthless. im just taking up space and i dont inform people of my troubles in fear that they will not understand, push me away, or lie to me. i dont feel like they care, i feel like im all alone. I sit here, in an empty auditorium and no one surrounds me. all my friends are with each other, but where do i stand? where do i belong? i don’t think i’ll ever find someone who will make me feel less lonely. I don’t think i ever will. I don’t want to keep going on like this, i want it to all stop. my family refuses me, my friends refuse me my school refuses me, and my own self love is non-existent. I dont want to do it, i dont want to put forth effort anymore, i just want to go somewhere else. I want to find a nice beautiful landscape i can treasure my thoughts and love into. i wish that i had some sense of mind and i could think straight but everything is hitting me at once and it hurts. I dont want to cry myself to sleep anymore. i want to die. thats what i want. im sure thats what everyone else wants too. They just want me to go away, and well i want that too. So im leaving. where to? i do not know. all i know is that i want to get out of here, away from all of these troubles. I fought for so long and for what? so that i can fight more? i try to stay strong but the whispers pull me down and i just dont want to hear it anymore. i might give life one more chance but i don’t know. Maybe i’ll be alone forever, maybe i’ll leave it all behind, and maybe even then, nobody will notice im gone.
    Goodbye, forever.

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    One Response to Goodbye

    1. 21 21
      April 21, 2017 at 2:59 am

      I would notice. I notice everyday already… guess that is the trouble in me. You know I am always willing to listen. You just have to let me know when its okay to call.



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