• if I could,

    by  • March 31, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Goodbye • 3 Comments

    I’d probably tell you I was sorry.

    But I know it’s for the best that I don’t. I don’t know how much of what we said to each other was truly meant, but I do know that most of it can’t be taken back.

    When we burned that bridge, we really made sure to bury the ashes, didn’t we?

    Even so, I’m sorry. I hope you’re doing okay. You probably are. This probably hasn’t even bothered you since last year. But still, I just worry sometimes.

    I wish we were better at talking through problems. I wish our parents never hurt us when we were kids. I wish that you never tried to pressure me. I wish we could take back the things we said. I wish I wasn’t foolish. I wish that you understood what I was trying to tell you last March. I wish I could understand you.

    I wish we were still friends. It’s just that now, whenever I think about you, it just makes me incredibly sad. Nothing can fix that.

    It’s like you said; I don’t think I can ever face you again.

    3 Responses to if I could,

    1. A friend
      April 1, 2017 at 9:28 pm

      This hits home for me. I wish a former mentor of mine would say this to me. He made me feel that I could be somebody, and now I feel rather worthless. Maybe you should tell your person how you feel. Even if nothing changes, it might help them feel better, which in turn would make you feel better, I’m sure.

      • ?
        April 3, 2017 at 12:39 pm

        I told my person how I felt and it was a disaster! She treated me like I was diseased and just sneezed all over her! Never again!

    2. Redstringoffate
      April 5, 2017 at 5:35 pm

      Red string on my little finger. I wish, oh how I wish, your balls were bigger. This makes no sense the words I write. I hate you like I hate to fight. Always forced to be the one with which lessons are learned. Always the spurned. Whatever the fuck you think it should be, I’ll never want you again. It’s not you. It’s me. Wait. It’s you. The fool.

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