• Heathens and the Recovery

    by  • February 15, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Thoughts • 2 Comments

    We all know the song… but ask yourself this?

    From one Heathen to another. Is recovery even possible at this point?

    Do they just keep preying?

    I think they do.

    I do

    We all do in some way or another.

    I used to bang my head against the wall to make the pain go away… it didn’t.

    I used to try and find love through sex and teasing her and many others…

    We were a crew from HELL and we loved it, per se…

    Ended up in jail for domestic violence charges and hurting the one that I loved the most…

    I don’t think I loved her … until I needed her.

    She’s better off without me .

    We laughed , we cried and she always tried to pick me up but it just didn’t work for us.. She was always picking up me when I lacked in human faith.

    The best gift she ever gave me was showing me time and time again, she didn’t give up on me..

    I abused her and I abused that trust she had in me. I failed her- more times than my mind will allow me to admit.

    There wasn’t any real reason except for the demons in my head.. she has a dark side to her too…but it was artistic and beautiful- she always protected me.

    It’s time for me to protect myself… I will always be a heathen, and maybe she will be too but I will never forget the gift she gave to me.

    I look at myself now- the good and and the bad.

    Do I have the power to change it and recover?

    Not yet.. Still a heathen.

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    2 Responses to Heathens and the Recovery

    1. how is
      February 15, 2017 at 1:30 pm

      being a heathen something that would be in opposition to choosing recovery and working towards positive outcomes?


    2. .
      February 23, 2017 at 7:20 pm

      … the hardest experience of my life is mourning the death of one who is still alive …



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