• Transgressions Reign

    by  • February 10, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Thoughts • 6 Comments

    God the Father, to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit I confess this sin of utmost magnitude : Lust

    It consumed me, swallowed me whole, the desire that I let drive me has pulled me down, into a deep fire that burns my essence with the knowledge of the sin but provides the comfort of giving into such a temptation. It’s hell so that’s the conflict in yourself; this is something they tell me I’ll burn for, but I’m burning already. It’s not hellfire, it’s heavenly.

    “For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature.”

    Admitting such a sin as mortal as lust is only met with shame and disdain. The oath of confessional cannot protect my secrets. My lust, my passion, they cannot be hidden away, for giving into lust makes me feel far more alive than I ever have in any mass, in any confessional. Because when she has her hands in my hair and my clothes are scattered on the ground, no words of priests are in my head. No scripture, no verse of righteousness. No holy rites spoken over me could cleanse my inequity. What is done is done. And what has happened will continue.

    “I will not look with approval on anything that is vile. I hate what faithless people do; I will have no part in it.”

    No holy water from cathedrals could exorcise it from me. It cannot be taken from me, because it is me. It became me the second my lips met with hers, and stayed with me long after I left. It stays with me as I return again and again. After every mass, I come back, addicted. Resistance is futile, lust and desire have captured my heart, there is room for nothing else.

    “But each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.”

    Threats of hellfire cannot obstruct me, nor can promises of heaven appease me. What could be better then something that makes you feel so alive? Something that sends life through your veins, instead of constant fear of transgressions that will win you eternal damnation, why not enjoy that which is lovely? Why not give in to such vehement beauty? For the threat of eternal damnation still hangs over your head, regardless of what sin you may be committing.

    “For all that is in the world—the desires of the flesh and the desires of the eyes and pride in possessions—is not from the Father but is from the world.”

    I welcome these earthly desires, for they give me a satisfaction the church cannot even hope to provide. All they can offer me is regret, pain, and guilt. They promised me death. Committing a cardinal sin is not a horror. I’ve broken these chains, lust has freed me. They clipped my wings and tied me down, but now I have risen, risen from rapturous flames like a Phoenix, I’ve seen an entire world of ardor.

    “Flee the evil desires of youth and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the lord out of a pure heart.”

    The priests can tell me what they wish. The church can condemn me, They can pray for my soul. They can curse my name to the end of their lives, but I have lived and so have risen, and they have lived trapped, caged, and sheltered. We must all die. And if when I die I should spend my life in eternal hellfire, I at least will know I spent my life soaring.

    “Give thanks to the Lord for He is good. For His mercy endures forever. Amen.”

    – RedAura and Viridian

    6 Responses to Transgressions Reign

    1. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 3:07 pm

      This made me cry. I could have written this. If only I were as talented as the author of this masterpiece. Wow! Every word felt as if the words belonged to my very being…..

      Take my breath away!

    2. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 6:23 pm

      Once you have received Jesus as your savior then you are forever free from hell. Just because your body lusts doesn’t mean your not saved. See as long as we live in our fleshy bodies we will never be perfect. Our bodies are so sick with fleshy sin that we can’t stop it on our own. Now just be caused your saved doesn’t mean you should walk around sinning all you want. I still stumble with fleshy sins and lust is a big one for me still. I have willingly sined. I have caved to lust full desires and have committed adultery after being saved. Trust me when I say I have suffered for it deeply. Not as punishment because Jesus took the punishment of all my sins to the cross. Notice that word ALL. That’s (past,present,future) sins. Us going to heaven doesn’t depend on us not sinning. Us going to heaven is by God’s Grace alone. Bible tells us all of this. Bible is God’s word. God doesn’t lie because God doesn’t sin and lies are sin, so we know when God says something He means it. We can take Him at his word. Just because you struggle with lust doesn’t mean your damned. Trust that Jesus’s blood is more powerful than anything, or anyone ( even you) could do. Nothing can separate you from God. God won’t let go of you. The only unforgivable sin is not believing in Jesus Christ. If you’ve already called on Jesus to save you then it’s only because God’s Grace drew you to do it. No human being would ever call on Jesus on his own doing. They are too blinded and sick with sin to even know they need Jesus. God’s grace has opened your heart to the truth of your need for Jesus. That’s the only reason you would have asked Him to save you. Confessing your sin, like you’ve done in this letter is a for sure sign that you indeed are saved by God’s Grace. Why? Because an unsaved person would never feel the need to confess the sin they commit. They think it’s a foolish thing to do. Unsaved people think the bible is a bunch of fairytale. You see it as truth. It’s beautiful how in this letter you are declaring your need for Jesus and how sin is a big struggle for you. Unsaved people don’t struggle with sin. They don’t even know what sin is. They don’t know of the need to cry out for forgiveness and confess the vileness of sin that they struggle with.

      Now that your saved doesn’t give you freedom to sin all you want although you can, but you won’t ever be comfortable with yourself and full of peace if you do.
      You now have a relationship with God through Christ so He can work with you and grow you more and more into His likeness. You will still fail some at sin. Even commit it knowing it’s wrong, but you can bet God who starts a good thing in you will finish the good thing He starts in you. He started a good thing in you when He drew you by His Grace. God chastens those He loves not as punishment, but as a loving Father correcting His child. I’m sure your dealing with some of that now. How can I tell? The plea in this letter shows spiritual struggle and sorrow over sin!!!!!

      God is the only one you can truly depend on. He promises to cleanse you as white as snow although your sins make you as red as crimson.

    3. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 6:31 pm

      Roman’s 8:38-39. Is of a comfort to me. It’s a promise in God’s word. He means what he says.

    4. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 7:20 pm

      Romans 10:13


      this is a promise of God’s in His word. Want to know my favorite part of this promise?
      “It’s the period at the end of it”. ” you don’t see an if, and or a but in front or behind it!” Isn’t that amazing that he leaves no other room for stipulations or add ons?!
      See its a simple promise from God. That period is one of the biggest periods throughout the bible for me. ????

    5. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 7:30 pm

      1 corinthians 2:14
      This one tells us about the natural man not understanding the things that come from God. I’m posting these verses to back up what I have explained in previous replies. When someone teaches another God’s word always make sure they can prove what they say by verses from the bible ( king James with basic English translation study guide ) is a good one to study from. It puts it in laymen terms and explains more clearly the text and meaning.

    6. @author
      February 12, 2017 at 7:50 pm

      Start trusting Jesus’s strength instead of your own. It’s His battle. You already belong to Him. I’m in the same boat as you. Everything will be OK. We are all guilty of giving into the fleshy side that feels good in these fleshy bodies. We are learning to become more spiritual by letting God work on us. It doesn’t happen over night. God knows that. We feel helpless to sin. Thats proof of our need of Jesus and His strength, because without Him it’s impossible. That feeling of helplessness is the Holy Spirit convincing us of our need for Jesus. Also proof that we also belong to God already. It’s also can be the enemy trying to put fear in God’s children so they paralyze in hopelessness so they stay unproductive. In any case your already saved. God would never hand you back to the enemy. Why?
      Come closer!
      Let me tell you something awesome!
      ” God has already won the battle”! ????

      Family Life Church, in a town next to mine is one I go to. Haven’t been in awhile, but I think it’s time……

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