It’s odd to live in a bubble, my bubble is formed of the illusion of life, of freedom. I have friends. They are distant, they don’t care for me or each other. I have family, they have all gone their own insane paths and we may as well be on other planets for how much impact we make. Just when somethings working, it’s falling apart.
The floors falling out from under my feet. Relationships end for the strangest reasons, people I think are full of truth are full of lies, and everyone wears a mask in a mad dance. The dancers are affection and jealousy, caring and selfishness, loyalty and disrespect.
Some people must lose out more then others. It’s not my fault I’m so analytical, I say odd things and I try not to but I can’t help the way my brain works. All of my oddities and my eccentricities are all that I am to these people, they can’t see the music, the art, the compassion. I’m overflowing with love and caring and there’s no one to give it to, no one who has deserved it, I’ve been cut and hurt by the people I let closest to my heart. Is it so hard to ask for another emphatic soul? Why am I alone ever day, why when I try so hard and believe so much in someone, do they go from being an angel to a demon?
Heartbreak, disappointment, I have never felt more like I have nothing then today.