• To you, prematurecosplay

    by  • January 9, 2017 • * Safe for Work *, Goodbye • 0 Comments

    I thought that we would always be sisters.
    But no.
    You left me because of bullshit accusations that your “precious fiance” pinned against me.
    I haven’t talked shit about you in I don’t even know how long.
    But you believed him.
    You believed whatever you have deluded yourself into thinking.
    That post was never about you.
    New Years. Nothing was about you.
    Now, as for me, I still love you.
    And despite how much it kills me to see you with him,
    I’m happy for you.
    Despite how much you hurt me,
    You deserve to be happy.
    And if that happy is without me and with him,
    Then so be it.
    These are just my 2 am, sad music jam thoughts.
    I thought you were going to be here for me forever.
    From suicide to math homework.
    I thought we were going to meet.
    I thought you were coming to Connecticut.
    I thought I was finally going to meet my big sister.
    I thought we were okay.
    That there was no more bad blood or any hidden hatred.
    I thought that you cared about me just as much as I did for you.
    I love you so damn much Ren, it’s unreal.
    But, you hate me.
    That much is evident
    I always thought that you were some sort of superhero,
    But no.
    You’re the sidekick who hides behind the somewhat brave hero.
    Both of you are cowards.
    Attack me and Maddy through a damn screen.
    That’s not how Maddy and I roll.
    You swore you would never hurt me.
    That you were sorry.
    That it wouldn’t happen.
    That you cared.
    That you loved me.]
    That you would never leave me.
    But now look at where we are.
    You hurt me.
    You were never sorry.
    It happened.
    You never cared.
    You never loved me.
    But you know what?
    I have a big sister who truly loves me.
    Who won’t hurt me.
    Who is actually here for me.
    Who wants me in her life.
    Who doesn’t treat me like a burden.
    She is everything you never were.
    I trust her.
    I care about her.
    I love her.
    And she does all of those things to me.
    Unlike you.
    I’m done with you.
    This is my final goodbye.
    Even though I doubt you’ll ever see this.
    I still love you, but only slightly.
    So long and goodnight.
    ~ Former Little Sis (a__d)

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