• the confused teen

    by  • December 7, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, Confusion • 1 Comment

    Dear someone,
    I don’t know if these letters are received by anyone. But assuming someone is reading this than at least mine did. You see I am writing this letter because I need to it makes me feel better if I think some one might read it. I am a hormonal teenager so maybe this type of thing is normal but I don’t know. Just so I don’t continue rambling here we go. Maybe by the end of my story you will understand or if you have the same problem you will know you are not alone. I will not use my real name for safety reasons but my name will be Sophia for now. I was born to two Christian parents by the time I was two I had accepted Christ as my lord and savior I knew he had something planed for my life and I could not wait. I was six when I first developed my problem. I lie, I lie about every thing, everything. I lie about stupid things like where or not I did my homework. Its just a white lie you might be saying. But no it would be less of a problem if I practically never did it. But I always lie. I start believing my lies. My lies are so complicated not even my friends know some of them are lies. My parents know I lie so they don’t believe anything I say anymore. My point is that through this all I don’t know my purpose. The one thing I have wanted since I was two. My parents relate everything to my schoolwork and my grades. My friends think of me as the girl they can tell there problems to and I will shut up, listen, and sympathies. Sophia my boyfriend broke up with me, Sophia my brother is such a pain, Sophia… i want to help them as much as I can but I want someone to listen to me for once. My parents say they will listen but they always talk about my schoolwork even now you can talk to me next sentence but you are not studying. Sophia what are you typing is it your vocab words? No… well then is it in French? Everyone in my life thinks I have it sorted out and am the perfect friend. But I am not I lie to everyone to hide the pain of the truth. I listen to everyone hopping they would listen to me. I get not so grate grades because I get home and read putting myself in a imaginary world away from reality. But inside I am a little girl curled up and hiding from time. I have my life planed out by all the people I know. The plan is I go to college to become a consoler or a lawyer then I get married pay of my debit work for awhile then I have kids and become a school consoler. In reality I just want to do what I want I want to create my own life just for me. So thank you whoever might read this it means a lot to me if you just read it and understand this confused teen. I know your life may be worse I know I am blessed but everyone has those small things they need to let out but no one will listen to. So thank you for listening to my problems it means a lot to me, feel free to write your own small problems out it relay helps.
    Sophia the confused teen.

    One Response to the confused teen

    1. J
      December 9, 2016 at 9:01 pm

      Dear Confused Teen,

      Your confusion will come and it will go. You will find clarity and a purpose. Time is your friend and your enemy, You will make friends and you will lose them. You will think you found “the one” several times. Your parents will be proud and disappointed in you. These things, they are what it is to make up a life. Your twenties will offer you really high highs and really low lows. Your concept of college, counselor/lawyer, marriage, kids picket fence…. these are what we all want. The fact you want to do it your way is the beauty of becoming an adult. Do not look at this world through a kaleidoscope. Make your self have options. See a bigger picture.
      These are all things you will hear over and over again and they are all true.
      Just know that confusion is all around you whether it is expressed or not.
      Take every obstacle one at a time.
      If the lying bothers you, then start small. Pick one person you want to be 100% honest too and try for 1 week to stay true. If that works move on to 2 weeks. Once you go a month of honesty to one person. try two people. The fact is we all lie. No matter how devout. Just make sure you never lie to yourself.

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