Since we were children i have loved you. I am so sorry things turned out the way they did but I am very relieved that you now know everything, God Ry I would never have abandoned you or got over you, you know there was a reason damn you for not trying harder but now you know….you said give it time and we will get through it but I don’t have much faith in waiting on you. You have the ability to put what is out of sight out of your mind something you did with me for a decade and a half. Me on the other hand has kept this secret for that long the entire while knowing that I loved you just the same as when we were 16 17 18 19 20 years old. I made that decision to not tell you and I’m sorry…so sorry. I altered the course of both our lives and I was so wrong I regret everything. If I could go back and fix it I would in a heartbeat. I want to make what’s wrong right but realize there is no magical button. If only I could make you “wake up” and realize that us seeing each other again wasn’t a coincidence if I could get you to see the huge neon sign that I see maybe you would get with it. Almost 25 years and it’s always been you.. it will always be you for me. 25 years of being my best friend even though we had a 14 year pause and 25 years of loving you. That means something, at least to me.