• Glad you’re far away

    by  • November 9, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, Betrayal • 7 Comments

    Because if you were nearer, I feel I’d make a pathetic arse of myself.

    Not that I don’t make a pathetic arse of myself anyway: I just do it in the privacy of my head
    My crazy head.
    The head that conjures up “happily ever afters” with the person who rejected me, and denied me even the small mercy of an explanation
    I really am an arse, eh?

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    7 Responses to Glad you’re far away

    1. Anonymous
      November 9, 2016 at 9:27 am

      This is probably not my person, but I will reply.
      Rejection and explanation…really? You would have to actually communicate your feelings in order to be rejected. Instead I waited years, until I was so crazy in my own head, I had to break free, and found a fucked up way to do it. The way I did it was wrong, so very wrong, for everyone involved. I recently tried to apologize and your response was basically “for what?”. I am still left in a place where I think “was I loved or was it all in my head?”.




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    2. M.
      November 9, 2016 at 2:41 pm

      I’m the pathetic arse author,

      Ah, you’re not my person, sadly.
      Good wishes to you though. Difficult, isn’t it, this love thing?




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    3. Lost
      November 9, 2016 at 3:17 pm

      Author, you and I are in the same boat. He rejected me. He did not reciprocate my feelings, why because he doesnt think of me that way. When I told him I loved him, he acted all weird and awkward. I had to change my statement and told him I love him as a friend because having told him hurt me a lot because it changed everything. Now cause I know the truth maybe I can move on but “No”. Its been 18 months now since things went to hell and I still cant move on. I can remember most details about him, his soft hands, the scar on his chin, his dimples, his small eyes, the bags under his eyes which he sometimes has due to lack of sleep, his voice, his smile.I remember the time he called my work and pretended to be a client and I knew it was him because of his voice. How I missed hearing his voice. I couldnt tell him that I knew it was him so I pretended not to know it was him. While my very being wanted to know why he was calling I couldnt do anything about it. I think he called 3 times if I remember. I tried asking him out as a friend to talk about some things, to clear the air, but he seemed not interested. So I let it go. I have stopped all together contact with him because each time I do I always seem to get hurt by something he does. So I let go. The guys I meet only seem to frustrate me deeply because I want him. A chance at love with him would have been a welcome reprieve for my hollow soul. I feel no joy. Everything seems ruined for me. It hurts all the time. Why did I say anything in the first place? Stupid. They say time will tell but I dont know.




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    4. Would it be better
      November 9, 2016 at 8:08 pm

      For me to say I am grateful for the apology and would like to continue knowing you?




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    5. Carefully filled out name bar
      November 10, 2016 at 1:15 am

      Ah, I’m not your person, I’m afraid.
      My circumstances are very different to yours
      Kindest wishes to you though.




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    6. No Maxine
      November 10, 2016 at 7:47 pm

      Love is easy.




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    7. @ would it be better
      November 12, 2016 at 12:19 pm

      I would love for us to get to know each other better. Although I feel I’ve known you all my life I know there is a lot to learn about you and it would be an honour. I find you so intriguing and multi layered.




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