• Sad

    by  • October 29, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 1 Comment

    It is such a struggle to remove someone embedded in ur heart, has done nothing but hurt you and abandon you over and over when u needed them most and you let them in cuz u feel at home. I hate how vulnerable I become with you. I trusted you, wish had fallen for someone worthy. A decade later I meet you and it just took three meetings to ignite the spark, break n shatter my heart for ever. I am trying, but don’t think this is going to heal like before.
    Why do u play such nasty games with me and why do I let u.
    Hope god helps me to put it behind me quickly.

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    One Response to Sad

    1. To Author
      January 21, 2017 at 2:46 am

      It’s easy for someone who is hurting to think that the person who created that hurt meant to do so. I didn’t mean to hurt him, though I did, he hurt me and in my black whole of sadness anger and frustration I hurt him back. He thinks it was all just some intentional elaborate decade long plan. It wasn’t.

      Casual sex that goes on, back and forth towing and growing over a decade. Without forgiveness or understanding of the other people’s perspective and those perspecitives and emotional capacities that bring about the actions of their own vulnerable and hurt inner child, it’s near impossible to see the causes and effects clearly.

      Anyway.




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