• Happy Birthday to me

    by  • October 24, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    For the first time in many years I actually celebrated with dear, close friends.
    I enjoyed every moment
    We laughed, shared stories, laughed some more, and some more and ate and drank to much
    Even Boots came out and played Clown

    I thought of you
    I thought of you before, during and here now after

    I can’t help but wonder..
    did you even think of me, did you think of me at all?
    Do you ever?
    How, I wish I knew how it is possible to just erase so many years the way you seem to have done.

    I am angry at my heart for loving you still!

    I am angry at myself because I want to be like those people who see
    love as a choice, as something to decide on and be able to rationalize into any situation life throws at us, to compartmentalize it away.

    I am so tired of this war between my head and the hole where my heart used to be.

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