• Loudest Silent Hymns

    by  • October 21, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 1 Comment

    Enlighten me

    How does that work

    How has that ever worked

    You got down on your knees and prayed for me

    When I know the truth

    Because I did it too

    It was a silent agreement

    I fell to my knees, not to pray but to fall apart

    You fell to your knees, not to pray but to work your witchcraft

    I admired your wisdom

    You admired my youth

    It began as an admiration

    But it was more

    I admired the way your hair fell to your shoulders

    You admired the golden locks I had falling from my head

    The dust from the ground staining our essences for years to come

    We never did anything

    But we didn’t have to

    There were those silent signs

    Those silent interactions

    The silent kisses

    The silent words

    I prayed for you, alright

    Just as you did for me

    The rain fell and so did I

    Cars were turning over in that parking lot as our silent union broke apart

    My life fell apart yet was glued together by your presence

    Now you’re gone and there is no glue

    Everything is falling, falling harder then i did for you

    Everything is broken, broken more then my spirit

    Your voice, soft, warm yet cold like almost winter fall weather, telling me I carry the weight of the world on my shoulders

    You were my world then

    When you were in it

    Silent prayers

    But now you’re gone and the world has gotten much heavier

    I no longer pray

    You don’t either

    You were the constant chaos

    The one chaotic note that lived in my life by my own will

    The song, those prayers, they were the only ones worth singing, falling to my knees for

    Those hymns you taught me

    They said more then I ever knew how

    Silent signs

    Words said without being said

    Do you pray still? For my world that I carry?

    Or do you imagine my freedom, knowing you were it and now you’re gone

    Well it’s heavier then ever

    When you’re in Calvary

    Do you see me?

    Do you remember my smiling face, kind eyes

    Do you remember my clear sadness, my fading essence

    Do you walk through every space we were and reminisce as I did?

    And when you go there, do you pray?

    I remember

    I remember your alluring magnetic eyes, that shared every secret you spoke to my own eyes

    I remember your happiness radiating from you when something had gone your way

    I remember breaking with you when you broke

    I remember the contorted face you would make, and my heart would fall to my stomach

    And I was there with you

    We held each other as we cried, we told each other everything we said in secret

    In silence

    Through our prayers

    I was always there with you, as you were with me

    I can never go there again

    But you can

    Please remember me and our days of endless prayers throughout that building

    The days we believed our silence was enough

    But it wasn’t

    Because I never got to tell you

    One Response to Loudest Silent Hymns

    1. A
      October 24, 2016 at 2:18 am

      Yes, I can relate to carrying my cross. God Bless, and I pray that you find peace to your seeming esoteric, enigmatic dilemma. And hopefully your Calvary won’t last for too much longer.

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