I can’t believe it’s over. After all this time.
So many years thinking you didn’t want me, that you didn’t want a relationship, that it was just sex, loving you, longing for your love all the while.
And now, months and months after your reveal of truth, after my fear, after your cruelty, after all the confusion when you told me it was just sex after all.
I spent 9 months confused, hurting, wondering which part was true, wondering if we got it all wrong, wondering if You always felt the same as I did.
I hoped, wished, willed and pushed for your return. And now, now you returned and I know the truth and I can’t see how it would work anymore anyway. And it’s up to me, it’s just over. It’s like you said the last time we started up again, baby, it just hurts too much.