I’m not expecting you to see this. Which is why I’m posting it here. I know your probably not the type to visit this site. In writing this here as a means of getting it off my chest.
I already apologized to you once, but I owe you a second apology. One I can’t say to you. At least not right now. I apologized for hurting you because I ended our friendship. I did not apologize for lying to you. Only part of what I said was true. The other part was made up to purposely push you away. I intentionally said things and acted a certain way that would make you avoid me. I was struggling, and I still am struggling. I felt like I was giving you more to worry about when you already had enough on your plate. Your trying to get an education and take care of other responsibilities. You don’t need me in your life. At least not now. The second reason I lied and put on a show was because I was becoming confused with my own emotions towards you. No matter how badly things are between me and my current relationship, I would never want to overstep boundaries or do anything that I wouldn’t want someone else to do to me. So I told you part of the truth, and acted a little more emotionally unstable than I really was. So that you would hate me and stay away. I want you to know that I got no pleasure out of it. I did not like hurting you. I did not like lying to you. It’s just better this way right now. I need to sort myself out and see where life is going to take me. If we are meant to cross paths again, I will tell you the whole truth at that point. Until then I let it out here.
I apologize to you………from the bottom of my heart I am sorry for everything. I hope everything is well with you.