• Worth Knowing

    by  • March 27, 2016 • * Safe for Work *, Thoughts • 3 Comments

    Since the beginning of the year, I feel like I have grown as a person in leaps in bounds. I’m questioning what I want out of life, easing out of my shell for my own personal growth, and rediscovering who I am. I have started talking to people in my classes, reaching out to make new friends, and reconnecting with old ones. I want to be happy and I’m choosing to find happiness by changing my life for the better. I am back in college and working towards a degree for a job that allows me to stand on my own two feet while doing something I will enjoy.

    I will no longer keep out the people that I love and my sister is someone who I love wholeheartedly. On Friday, I called my sister and we had an honest conversation about being stuck in unhappy marriages. I had suspected that she was unhappy and I couldn’t quite figure out if she wanted to talk about it or how she would react if I asked her point blank if she was happily married. I did know if I didn’t try to connect with her and take that risk by reaching out to her, things would stay the same and I don’t want that for either of us. We shared our lives with each other as we never had before and it was such a relief to both of us. She confided her secrets and I revealed things that I had never told anyone else, things I had been compartmentalizing for well over a decade.

    I lost myself for a very long time by allowing him to steal pieces of me until I was only a shadow of who I had been. I could not figure out why he was so anxious about my return to college and why he had attempted to delay it instead of supporting my efforts. I now know it’s because he knew, HE KNEW, once I was let out of my cage and I would never want to return.

    3 Responses to Worth Knowing

    1. Lima
      March 28, 2016 at 5:51 pm

      Sorry for commenting.
      But I feel I relate in some way. Can I just say, people who love you will only want to change you for your own good? As soon as it makes one feel uncomfortable and they cant reach their full potential because the person they love won’t support them then its a big question.
      Its so good to keep at education.
      We learn every day and still die stupid, thats a quote by the way.
      I wish you well , Please do whats best for YOU. Leave the cage .

      Love is meant to be something more than a cage. Do what makes you happy, be with one who will always support you no matter what. Be with one who will be there when you make a mistake so they can say get up , dust yourself off amd try again. Sorry again , just felt like saying this x

    2. @Author
      March 29, 2016 at 1:50 pm

      A partner should always inspire the other in their pursuit of their goals. Otherwise it’s not love!

    3. author
      March 30, 2016 at 3:07 pm

      Please don’t apologize for replying because your encouraging comments are appreciated. I do agree that love does not seek to restrain, but instead should give you wings. I hope to one day be with someone who will love me that way, who will return the love that I have to give.

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