I know you will never come across these words, but they are from the heart.
Wasn’t long ago that I realised when I am writing to you and wr exchange words that they become so, beautiful.
You have helped me so much with , him and the situation. First you helped me open my eyes, I learnt what love is. Genuine love. The kind which doesn’t expect absolutely no thing, nothing…in return.
You are no angel and neither am I. We hardly judged each other, I know that every word you sent me was making a difference, maybe because I have so much respect for you or maybe because you happen to be that person who is just genuine. I often closed my eyes when you’d send me an audio or id speak to you on the phone, you had such a comforting effect. I don’t think, that il ever be able to thank you enough. You have showed me more emotionally than a physical hug, a touch a kiss. You dearest are the perfect example of a friend ..
Someone who gave me so much yet wanted nothing in return. I regret not having that coffee with you. But I am so cherophobic, Ive become so fragile the best thing I feel is distance I don’t know why but yesterdays trick made me realise that its not just the possibility of it being a lie but the fact he was so unloyal to you that it came back to me. Rather than giving you an ultimatum or asking you to make a choice between us I am making this decision because I feel its the right one.
I just feel weak but angry too and If there is any possibility in hurting you I will rather distance myself than risk it. To hurt offend or disrespect you would be the last thing ever that i would allow.
I know you would be on his side , my heart tells me so but thats ok. I understand. I lied to you by saying am not hurt. Its hurt me … so much that I miss you More than il ever miss him yet… well, you know the irony in that.
You bring such smiles to my face that it bought tears on my eyes. You might think you haven’t touched me. But you know what? You have. More than you will ever know and you touched me right in the heart. And it warmed me up at the moment i needed it most.
I wish you soo much happiness. You muppet. But I want you to be healthy happy jolly and remain wanderfully amazing a man that you truly are.
You are wrong about me being a star.
Believe my words you are the star.
If you had hurt me (and his bs was right) if anything i spit at his loyalty because i know for a fact you would never do that to him. And you hurting me?
Id let you do it again and again and again anything just so you are peaceful.
Because you deserve so much better I am leaving a space open in your life for someone who deserves your friendship. I dont. Everything I touch breaks.
They are lucky , so lucky to have you. If I had a choice and had it different. Id give it all to spend time in your “halo” presence, just to talk to you , write with you, laugh with you and let my eyes dance over yoir face while you smile.
I love you. Ok not sexually or. .you know.
But I do and thats the best thing I have learnt in life, and you were my teacher
I will miss you, I already do.
I pray for all the best come your way i.s.A
Tonight 11 was the new 12.
🙂 You light up the world just by existing, so as long as you are there, anywhere il be able to “see” when its dark.