I remember the very second that I saw you. You quietly floated through the classroom door, in your flowered sweater, blue jeans and blonde hair as my heart took control and became my new guide. Without conscious control, my senses focused on you and my thoughts stopped, as if the whole world ceased to exist. My physical being faded away like a vapor, while the sight of you filled the void. Without knowing it, you changed my life, you gave me hope and dreams. You inspired me to become a better man, to become more patient, more considerate and more courageous. With you, I could achieve anything and together anything would be possible.
I lived a lifetime with you before you even knew me. Thoughts of you filled my days and my nights with visions of moonlit dances in the spring, candle lit picnics under star light in the summer, long walks in the fall, and cuddling close under warm blankets in the winter. When we spoke our words were wrapped in care and concern for each other, which left us feeling safe and valued like treasure.
I imagined that together we would build each other up, create dreams, revel in memories, and add goodness to this world. Our arms would hold each other in happiness, support each other in sadness, comfort each other in grief. We would reach each other when we were apart and embrace each other upon our reuniting.
I dreamed enough for both of us. A full life time complete with a happy ending. Together, holding hands and waiting for eternity.
I have been holding on to these feelings for 31 years and I felt the need to finally express them. Even thought we could never be together, you were my first true love. You created beauty in me for which I am forever grateful. I love you with all my heart and I hope that you have the most beautiful life possible, with all the happiness that God can give you.