• ..

    by  • December 28, 2015 • To You • 2 Comments

    When a long distance relationship ends what is left is that bitter taste in your toungue and a cold inside that leads you to run far so fast trying to burn inside to fight it..realizing that the miles flown are so few with respect to to the miles walked inside the mind, looking too much forward and thinking about that, before or later, all this would have led to something..that famous our day will come..
    Fleeting meeting, dates arranged as a puzzle, almost risking to be fired, days and hours devoured by the time, time,it has never been one of our friend.
    When they start, these kind of stories have those brilliant eyes of who want to hug and stop the time, fingers worn out by email and messages, words, phrases, pictures, so many, myriad, cause it’s like u would like to disclose all your universe to the other, because you want to bring him or her close to you, through the screen..showing to the other the way you are, both good and evil sides, in order to give a chance to her/him to go away whether she or he desires it: it’s like you beg the other “if you want to go away, do it right now, before nothing belong to us yet”
    And then nothing..afternoons spent in airports, on a bench close to other people..heart beating has never before..the first contact, even if i’m not used in normal life, almost shy to touch her..night spent without sleep thinking about her, us, smiles, our yelling, about the next meeting..being happy being upset, being unsecure if u r fine, almost scared to never be able to know enough your language to properly interact with your parents, that minidictonary on my desk at job, ur presents, that mobile, your inflection in trying to speak in my language that made me laughing so much and u couldn’t get..that damned Lost in Translation that hampered to send you to fuck properly, or, maybe, that holy lost in translation, without which id have never thought to put myself in certain situations..even if i told u the contrary, i do not regret about anything..
    after all finished there is just a is a bunch of flight receipt and that feeling of shining satisfaction in the eyes of those skeptical people who were looking at this story and now they know it’s done.
    And so everything finishes in writing down on a text file words that will be read by who will find out this story among billion of others
    I’m looking at the screen and i do think i’ll finish here this letter, right now, i’ll go to the balcony and i’ll try to see through this fog and the annoying christmas lights of the balconies of the building in front of me..asking to myself if 1000 miles away someone is doing the same..it’s a pity i already know the answer

    2 Responses to ..

    1. N
      December 29, 2015 at 8:36 am

      It felt terrible to read this. Heart breaks are miserable sons of bitches. I am sorry you had to go through this experience. I hope you heal soon.

    2. M
      December 29, 2015 at 4:43 pm

      This is me – only it was 10,000 miles away. I flew, he fucked me and dumped me the next day, saying he had problems with how big I was and would not waste time stringing me along the next 14 days faking interest. I’m sorry you got hurt. I’m sorry he fell in love with a fantasy.

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