• White Demon

    by  • September 7, 2015 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    I don’t want this

    This decision

    This choice

    The place I thought I’d always be, that if anyone tried to make me leave they’d have to kill me first

    But, the place wasn’t what kept me

    It was you, always

    But now, you’ve ripped out my insides and fed them to your dogs

    This isn’t the first time

    It’s been piece by piece, day by day, month by month, year by year, until all at once

    This is it

    I either return, to the place I knew as where my heart resided,
    To the place it was torn from my chest

    I could come back
    Basically with a sign on my back reading “take your aim”
    Throwing myself into flames
    Pulling the trigger to my head

    Suicide

    Have I gained strength? Yes.
    But has it ever worked with you? No.

    You approach me, look at me with your eyes
    Speak those fake words but my soul will suck them right up
    My arms will unwillingly wrap themselves around you
    Until I cannot resist any longer and I find myself unable to leave your arms

    I’ve so much enjoyed this short-term freedom

    Let’s not forget about the fear,

    The black invitation to the place that cannot change

    Wild, strangely holy

    If I leave, if I stay,

    Either way I live

    And either way I will die

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