• Don’t know ………………..

    by  • August 14, 2015 • Confusion • 0 Comments

    The day you messaged me, talked to me, encouraged with your words of endearment.
    I was confused and I’m usually very friendly with my friends. But, you knew I could’t trust anyone because of my breakup.
    But you evaded my thoughts, told that you would help me resolve my issues regarding my EX.
    Then you start to like me because we had things in common but my deepest darkest secrets, that burned deep in my soul, you didn’t know. Then you asked me to have sex with you, I declined saying That I would be having only with one person who would be with me forever and that person would be my hubby. Then you told you want to be that person.You started to break down all the walls that I had build to keep my heart safe, so that there won’t be feelings involved, just casual sex.
    The day you confessed about your girlfriend, I felt bad but, then you revealed that you are still in contact with her and speak with her regularly, even after she cheated on you. Then I thought maybe it’s only for few days but now I don’t know how you’re still interested in giving suggestions. Shit no one can ask suggestions about their life with their EX, that too about the guy she would want to fuck, fucking bullshit,either u are not over her or its the other way around. Then you wanted to meet me , the day we met, I laid out all my secrets to you, and we had sex ,we drank. Then u confess that you had sex with your Ex, which you had kept a secret from me.
    But still I believe you ,trust you , don’t want you to go out of my life. You bring spark and have rekindled the hope which I had lost a year back. Then suddenly you ask that you want a baby with me, when I settle in my life, so that we can take care of it. But you are not ready to accept me as your girlfriend. You tell that you don’t want to leave me ,you want to be with me forever, even though either one of us marry.
    There is no logic in that ,but still I’m not ready to leave u and walk away.
    You share everything with me,and tell that I’m very close one to you,more than a friend. You don’t share many things with your friends but you want to share it with me.
    You have made yourself clear that its not something like fuck buddies or friends with benefits. You have also made clear that you wont fall in love. But we have regular sex,then cuddle, talk about anything and everything.
    But I want to be with you always ,and I’m already deep and to the point of no return, if you leave me now I don’t know if I’ll be able to hold the already shattered pieces of my heart which would be definitely blown to dust.
    So I’m seriously in a muddled up state as to what the hell that’s between us !!

    Leave a Reply