• I Know a Secret

    by  • June 28, 2015 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 3 Comments

    I know a secret.

    You can’t keep one.

    Not even when it is a very private matter. Not even when it’s about the one you want most. Not even when it’s a matter of life and death.

    And it doesn’t take very much for a complete stranger to get you to pass along all you know. Let them show you just enough attention for them to get what they’re looking for, and you’ll reveal the most intimate details.

    I know a secret. You can’t keep one.

    But that’s not the secret I know. Anyone who knows you past your first few kisses knows you can’t keep a secret, since it only takes a few kisses to find out anything about anyone whom you kissed before. Each one of us has been stupid enough to think we’ll be different, that you’ll keep our confidences despite how bad you are about keeping secrets for anyone else. But we’re not all that surprised when we find out we’re like everyone else. You can’t keep our secrets either.

    The real secret is that we’re supposed to keep that a secret, about how you can’t keep one. Even though everybody knows you can’t keep a secret, nobody is supposed to say so. Your unwillingness to keep a secret is supposed to be kept secret.

    So supposedly you do nothing at all wrong when you violate a trust by spreading a secret. Yet we’re doing something terribly wrong if we disclose your secret that you can’t keep a secret. Absurd, but that’s the secret we’re really not supposed to let on that we know.

    Alright, then let me tell you something we’ve all been bad about keeping secret from you. We all do know. Some of us have found out the hard way, but there isn’t anybody who doesn’t know that if we want something kept private, we’d best make sure you never find out.

    Try to keep it secret that you don’t keep secrets, and you’ll have none to keep.

    Related Post

    3 Responses to I Know a Secret

    1. Too many secrets
      June 28, 2015 at 2:33 pm

      I hate secrets. I feel that the world would be a better place and far less hypocritical and deranged if people were just transparent, open and honest about their actions, choices, intentions, lives, and everything.

      I get what you are saying that people want secret-keepers for friends, but for me personally, I hated having friends who had a million secrets to keep. They were so fucking shady and backstabbing. EVERYTHING in their lives was a secret and they were so different than the faces they put on for the world.

      One time these “friends” started telling me fake secrets to “test” me. So-and-so ate out this person in this ridiculous situation, this person has parasites, and so on. I made sure I let the person being (fake) gossiped about know that I had heard about their “scandalous” life and repeated the secrets every chance I got to those people, even years later, because it pissed me off so much. I don’t think they ever caught on that I knew they were all full of shit. The funny thing is, they backstabbed each other all the time, kept none of my own secrets, and this small group of people was the antithesis of trustworthy so the testing was SO hypocritical.

      Anyway, no loss in the end… and good riddance! But I see both sides.


    2. Too many secrets, continued
      June 28, 2015 at 3:05 pm

      Now my only friends are people who are transparent and loud-and-proud about what they do no matter how embarrassing it is, OR people who don’t really have many secrets to keep because their lives are non-scandalous and simple.

      Problem solved, and so much easier to not have to keep track of the million things I can’t disclose versus what I can.

      Also, I’ve noticed that people who DON’T like secrets are also MUCH LESS LIKELY to sleep with my boyfriends, or cheat on their spouses, or do other shitty things they wouldn’t want me/others to know about! Haha, no surprise there!

      I like people who only have one or two hush-hush secrets IF any…. the rest can shove it. Sorry, that’s just the other side of the coin.


    3. More rambling!
      June 28, 2015 at 7:28 pm

      Oh I’m having the worst post-douchebag-trauma-disorder just thinking back to all of it. They would all date and cheat on each other and then tell me about it, and I wouldn’t tell the other mutual friend who was being cheated on, and they would sleep with my own lovers, and yet somehow I was the bad guy. Somehow I was the blabbermouth and yet I kept all of their shitty dealings under wraps and protected their egos and reps WAY more than any of them ever covered my ass. They never had any issue blabbing about my life to anyone with an ear. Know why? Because I was the only one that ever told the truth about anything in that group of shitbags and that leaves you exposed when you are dealing with snakes. I was certainly no angel but holy shit what a bunch of creeps. Ahh… I feel better… sorry to hijack your letter. I hope that all of them are still cheating and being cheated on, lying and being lied to, backstabbing and being backstabbed, and otherwise slithering through life with their retarded secrets. What a bunch of assholes.



    Leave a Reply