• Can I just rant for a minute?

    by  • March 24, 2015 • * Safe for Work *, Acceptance • 1 Comment

    So ive come to the conclusion that I suck.
    In School I sucked,
    In College I suck.
    In Work I suck,
    Not only am i mediocre at everything I do, but I have no fricken friends. I dont know how I am suppose to not suck. Sure, everyone says that children learn by mimicking the actions of those in their company, but i cant seem to grasp it . I just….suck.
    Its hard for me, I feel like I am meant to be a bum, that Im meant to screw up everything, that I’m meant to overreact to every single situation Im faced with. Its my way or the high way alright? but that doesnt work, I mean …..I suck.. I suck so bad that my way has left me on the highway with no buddies to speed chase with .. And tonight, while all my housemates go out and enjoy themselves… Im here writing my annonymous letter as to how much I suck.. I mean.. is that pathetic? sad? depressing? weird? Probably…

    When my mom asks me why am i not popular, I cant answer her.. she always tells me that she always had friends and had boyfriends and she got along great with her mother.. and I just suck……

    One thing I do have is my boyfriend of nearly 6 months.. he doesnt think I suck…most of the time, but he does see how I get when i lose control.. and yet hes still here so i guess he believes in me..or maybe he hasnt realised how much I suck..

    Can you guys do one thing for me, as i finish this letter..
    You may think you suck, like i do..
    but as much as we are tied up with all our suckiness just remember that sucking at stuff isnt so bad.. i mean were good at it..so thats a plus..right?

    ^ I tried to be funny to help my tears go away.. I suck at jokes too!



    One Response to Can I just rant for a minute?

    1. Yeah you suck.......or do you?
      March 24, 2015 at 2:15 am

      You suck because of comparisons. Want to be popular or want to have friends, want to be clever or want to know something specific?

      You are sucking at being the natural joker, or natural beauty or natural brain etc etc.
      But here’s a little thing to know.
      So did i, i used to have 0 friends and be rubbish at a lot of things. I changed schools became popular then sucked again.
      Why? Well a lot of things but let’s break it into the simple rather than the long drawn out.

      How is it i now am the joker, popular, do well and am clever?
      I decided to learn things, all sorts of things, i’d read magazines on rubbish like beauty tips, on health, on politics, and i would learn things i actually liked. That gave me the ability to know things to talk about.
      I learned a lot of jokes i memorised. So i knew funny jokes even if not my own. But i found the more jokes i read and understood, the more i could see how a thing could be made funny.
      I also started in clubs,so could you, football,dance,chess,computers, girl guides, whatever.

      Then i let things develop as they would, i made sure i was a loyal friend, not a push over and i never succumbed to pressure to do something, like if someone said let’s get drunk, i wasn’t going to just to be cool.
      That changed me a bit but i still had social fears and other weaknesses feeling of inadequacy, but i got into jobs and decided whatever it was i’d learn a step at a time and hone my ability even if it was trash collecting.
      So i became good at any job i did, i would say hey to work mates, i would continue to learn things.

      Eventually i, as a result of forcing myself out of my comfort zone, learning new things, being around others, just evolved my sense of humour, my social skills, my ability in work in many different fields, and i stopped sucking, it didn’t mean i never found sucky times in life, heck right now my job sucks, and i owe some money, am not with who i love most. But i have a relatively good life, and am pretty well liked by everyone i meet.
      But i did or didn’t do things because of what i wanted, not becase of parents or other kids expectations or societal expectations.
      Relax, sounds like you’re young still, so chill, plan your path, choose your interests and follow that and along the way, you’ll blossom and become as popular and un-sucky as you want to be.

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