Our time together was both the happiest moment of my life and my most regretted.
Even after all the years the feelings are still as vivid as if it was only yesterday- the butterflies erupting when I saw your face, the warmth of your body, the beating of your heart when we hugged, the way your lips felt when we kissed, and the serenity and security of being close to you. Time seemed to stop, all my worries and problems were swept away, and we had the whole world to ourselves when we were together. We were in love. We were happy. We planned out our lives together and everything seemed like it was going to be so perfect. It was true-love… and it wasn’t long before the world came crashing back with a vengeance. It became a struggle to be together. At times it looked hopeless. It was Us against the World, the odds were against Us, but somehow we rallied the strength to stand. We promised each other we’d never give up. We’d be together. Forever. And nothing could tear us apart… Nothing. Our love could endure anything.
My life was stripped from me before my eyes. Everything I loved was taken from me and my future was erased. I suffered uncountable hours of unimaginable agony and unbearable loneliness. I wouldn’t give up though, because I knew once it was over we would be together again.
I should have known you’d be gone when it was finally over. I was a fool to believe in happily-ever-after. You gave up and moved on. I couldn’t believe it. I was abandoned by the last thing I still valued in life. It just couldn’t be over..
I’m haunted by memories of you and plagued by thoughts of you. Walking aimlessly, in hopeless denial, through the devastation and ruin of the life, looking for a love that I know is dead.
Walking away when you came back into my life was one of the toughest decisions I’ve ever made. I had to do it for my sanity and pride. I couldn’t live with you so close but just out of reach.
I still love you. I tried to move on and but it’s apparent I never will be able to. I’ve learned to accept that time doesn’t always heal all wounds and nobody is promised happiness.
I will always love you even though you no longer feel the same for me. You are the most beautiful and amazing person I have ever met. If you ever find that a shard of the love you once felt for me survived, and that you do want to be with me, I will always be here. I will always be available and willing to try, because you’re truly irreplaceable.
Lol. I will never send this though.. it’s better to live with my delusional hope than face reality.