• To my father

    by  • March 12, 2015 • * Safe for Work *, Betrayal • 1 Comment

    Thank you.

    Thank you for showing me the true meaning of selfishness.

    Thank you for proving that only naïve idiots take people for what they appear to be.

    Thank you for taking my good intentions and twisting them into something dark.

    Thank you for taking my daughter’s unconditional love for others and using it against her.

    Thank you for showing me that the loudest voices against an action are the ones who secretly want to join in.

    Thank you for making me question everything you’ve ever said or done.

    Thank you for showing me that people who are suspicious of others are the ones to beware of.

    Thank you for ensuring that I will never again feel peace of mind when my children are away from me, no matter where they are or who they are with.

    Thank you for being the monster you always warned me about.

    Thank you for driving a wedge between me and part of my own family – at least now I know which ones are too sick to see the truth for what it is.

    Thank you for showing your true colors by pretending that this is somehow my 10-year-old daughter’s fault.

    Thank you for my daughter’s life lesson that even family cannot always be trusted.

    Thank you for the fact that my daughter has years of therapy ahead of her.

    Thank you for forcing me to lie to her about where you are, so that she doesn’t feel guilty, you unimaginable bastard.

    Thank you for forcing me to do the hardest thing I’ve ever done – telling strangers what you did, knowing that you would probably spend the rest of your life in prison.

    Thank you for making me envious of those who have fathers that truly love them – you have made it undeniably clear that the only person you truly love is yourself.

    Thank you for shattering my heart and causing this nearly crippling pain. At least there are periods of numbness that make it more bearable…and under that, a rage just beneath the surface that frightens me with its intensity.

    But above all else I thank God that my daughter told me what was going on before you got around to raping her. DO NOT DENY that it was going to happen. DO NOT stack one more lie on top of all of the others. I hope that you are able to find peace and that prison isn’t as hard on pedophiles as you always said it was. And I hope that somehow, someday you are able to become the honest and moral person you always pretended to be. I won’t hold my breath.


    One Response to To my father

    1. J~
      March 12, 2015 at 8:13 pm

      I wish I could be there for you.

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