• Closure

    by  • February 10, 2015 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 3 Comments

    My love,
    There are times like these that I never want to let you go. I hold on so hard by writing letters in the hopes that you wil find them again. Instead of hearing your voice I hear nothing at all from you. It breaks my heart to know that you will never know how much I love you. You taught me how to love. True love is a choice to love someone else through the good and bad, to be committed, honest, kind, selfless, understanding and loyal. I love the saying “love never fails.” In saying that I can honestly declare that I will always love you. You will have a special place in my heart. You said that you were never coming back, and for the longest time I could not accept that. I hung on for dear life and wrote more letters to you in hopes that it would bring you back. I longed for a miracle. I prayed that you would hear my heart calling for you and then coming running back. Nothing. It has taken me months to realize that you have moved on. Even now I battle with myself wanting to hang on to the hope that you loved me too. Knowing that would set my mind at peace. There was so much that you never said and so much that I know you wanted to tell me. I’ll always wonder why you didn’t. Our love story will always be like an unfinished journal. One that I will tenderly keep tucked away where I can take it out and remember those special and few times together. It would be easy to say goodbye but our story never got a proper ending. Maybe someday you can change all that. But for now I guess this is the only closure I get. My love, I will always love you. May we both find peace and happiness wherever life takes us even if it’s in opposite directions.

    Love always,
    A

    3 Responses to Closure

    1. C
      February 10, 2015 at 8:00 pm

      Dear A. I know how you feel, share this painful/sweet hope in the best and worst of ways. It is the hardest thing to let go of the one you love. Even when you know it’s time. I wish you well. C

    2. Dear C
      February 12, 2015 at 2:27 pm

      Thank you for your encouraging words. I hope and wish the best for you.

    3. Dear A
      February 13, 2015 at 3:41 pm

      It’s okay to miss them, A. To hope and be faithful to your love is a beautiful and admirable thing. Just don’t let it drain your spirit for too long. Nine months have passed since things started falling apart with my friend and lifelong love. I haven’t seen him in at least six months, then went forty days no contact Dec-mid Jan. And now haven’t spoken to him in a month. You, like me seem ready to face reality, yet also, like me, you want to trust in love and hope. What I want to impart is this: It’s important to check your instincts at the door. After reading letters here, and then writing, much like you, I finally accepted that he isn’t here. He’s living his life without me. Only yesterday, in the car, my mind wandered to him again, and I had a strong image of him at the park where we used to sit and talk. But then I decided TO PROVE MY INSTINCT WRONG. Went to the park. And he wasn’t there. It was all in my head. It was the music on the radio. It was residual threads of my emotions tugging on my heartstrings; just synapses firing away in my brain. It was a revealing, if rough lesson. Try it. It helps make letting go of them easier, allows your brain to steer toward life, and reality; like light shining through the fog. I’ll always hold him dear. But I won’t kid myself anymore. It’s time for us to live. So close the journal, embrace life, and love again, A. I encourage you to out with friends this valentines day. Live well and as the old song goes, love the ones you’re with. Happy Valentines Day, Dear A. Love C

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