I know. I shouldn’t call you that anymore. You’ve moved on. You never loved me “romantically.” But it’s just so hard for me. You were my everything. My best friend. I told you all my secrets. I trusted you. I loved you.
But I feel like I always knew that you didn’t love me. Sure, you played the part well, but thinking back, I don’t think you ever meant the nice things you said. Every time you said you loved me was a lie. So why am I still hung up on you?
Because I loved you. I still do. I shouldn’t. But I do. You always made me so happy. I can’t move on because I don’t want to. I want you back. I want my best friend back. I want to feel like I’m loved, feel like I’m worth something, feel like life is meaningful. But I don’t. And I won’t.
You said We’d move on.
I know you have.
But I haven’t.
And I’m not sure I can.