• Trust

    by  • November 29, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, To You • 0 Comments

    What is it, exactly? It should be mutual, never “unrequited”.

    Why didn’t you trust me? Was it because I wasn’t all over you like white on rice? Was it because I said I i’dn’t like pet names? Was it because I wasn’t accustomed to hugging people?

    What about the fact that I remembered the little details? That I called you by your name, that I said your name every time I spoke to you? That I always asked about the things that were important to you? That I did hug you, because it would make you happy, even if it was awkward and i nearly stepped on your foot?

    You never said my name talking to me, unless I asked you if you remembered what it was. I only heard you mention it once without my prompting, and you were speaking to someone else.

    You never asked me why I was upset that time. You just said, oh that sucks, and started talking about inane shit as you usually do.

    You said you liked that I wasn’t always up your arse and demanding and whiney like your previous choices. That I was honest. You said you understood why I was cautious and respected why I didn’t want to rush things. You said you understood we’d both been hurt by people who claimed to care about us.

    But you never respected me. You never respected my time. You never respected me when I said I was nervous. You never respected that I wanted my life in order too.

    So why were you so suspicious and not trusting of me? You were the one wanting to push things faster. You were the one who decided one night that I was a cheating slut like the rest of them and sent me abusive messages after “checking up on me” right when I was considering getting the rod and wanting to sleep with you.

    You apologised and I accepted, idiot that I was. I should’ve known better. I should’ve known you would say whatever you thought it would take to get you what you wanted.

    I’m so relieved I never slept with you. You would have ditched me anyway, you would have accused me of cheating and messing with you anyway. At least I still have some dignity.

    You, sir, are an arsehole.

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