I could get out of my head for a while because you are there.
I don’t understand why I can’t forget about you. You are not mine to love….and yet…I do.
You are my best friend and also married to another of my best friends. I know it’s wrong to think of you this way. Neither of us are free but yet, in spite of the fact that I didn’t set out to fall in love with you… I did.
You are such an amazing person. I watch her take you for granted and give you such a hard time for no reason at all….and I want to shout…”wake up! Don’t you see what you have? Don’t you realize how special he is?
I know you aren’t mine to love. YOu belong to her, who is also my best friend. Yet…Damn, I’ve been fighting this for so long. I didn’t set So why can’t I fogto fall in love with you. You are married to my best friend and I count you among my best friends as well. Yet, somewhere along the way…I’m not sure exactly when….I crossed that line and fell in love with you. YOu consume my thoughts, my fantasies, and yet I know how wrong that is. Part of me wants to change because I know how wrong it is. Neither of us are free. Yet there is that part of me deep down inside that wants to hold on to the way I feel.
You kissed me that day yet when I asked you why, you couldn’t give me an answer. There have been moments since that day that I have thought I saw a something in your eyes that said “Nothing has changed. I wish you were mine.” Yet, when I look closer, that look is gone. Thoughts of you drive me out of my mind.
Gah! I miss you so much. i long for you. Is it wrong? ABSOLUTELY! Si tell me…why can’t I forget you? You are hundreds of miles away, but yet you are still on my mind.
I can’t seem to forget about that day. Even though it has been almost two years now, I close my eyes and I can still see the way you looked at me. I can still feel your touch. I can still taste your lips on mine. Why in the hell I torture myself with these memories I will never know.
You can never be mine when you belong to her and I belong to him….So why in the hell can’t I forget about you???!!!! Why do I sit here tonight trying to drown you out of my mind, out of my memories, with the help of Smirnoff? Why do I crave you, your touch, the way you look at me, your kiss? Why can’t I forget you???!!! I know we can never be and, who knows, I may not ever cross your mind.
But just tell me this…
Why is it that when I hug you, you hug me back like you never want to let go? Why do I sometimes see that look in your eyes that says I’m not the only one that feels this way? As wrong as I know it is, if you were here right now, I would say to you the words that have been floating around inside my mind for almost as long as I known you. I know that it is wrong, and I promise I didn’t plan for this happen. I didn’t set out with this on my agenda. BUT somewhere along the line of our friendship, I fell in love with you. It breaks my heart to say that. I never wanted it to happen. Bt I guess sometimes the heart wants what it wants…right or wrong. I can never tell you in person but let me tell you here that I love you…and memories of that day haunt me. There is a part of me that just wants another chance to be in your arms, to hold you, to return your kisses, and to show you how very much you mean to me, no matter how wrong it is.
God forgive me. I lvoe you and I miss you. I hope there comes a day when you can be honest wit ne and just tell me why you kissed me that day. I know why I kissed you back but I don’t understand why you kissed me. You said you didn’t know why but I can’t imagine any man kissing any woman THAT way and not know why. I love you inspite of the fact that I belong to another man that I lvoe as well. Am I imgining what I see in your eyes? Do you care for me as more than a friend? I should be sorry for those kisses that day, but God help me, deep down….I know I’m not. DAMN, I MISS YOU AND I LOVE YOU….for whatever that is worth to you…