• Unconditional

    by  • November 19, 2014 • * Safe for Work *, Heartbreak • 0 Comments

    I can’t stop it, i am so lost, i want this turned off, i hate that i love you, it hurts.
    Because i told you and that cost me you in my life, i can’t stop wishing i could go back in time.
    I know it was a complicated situation, and maybe you could be thinking, if you think of it all, that i am over you, i made you think so. But i am not, i never will be.
    This is a curse, i love you every way possible.
    Why have i not tried to see or speak to you again though? Because you don’t want me to. So i do what you want. But i’d be first to fall at your feet, first to carry you in my arms.
    I wish you find someone that loves you like i do. I wish you happy, i wish you all you ever hoped and dreamed of.
    Me i am selfish and self centered because i am consumed in my own aching heart. I want to cry and never stop, i want to beg you for you to even be a friend again.
    I want to give you all i am and all i have. Just to be in your life again.
    But i cannot do a thing. I would pay untold amounts just to be your friend, do any task if it would bring your smile back for me.
    I love you beyond words and i don’t want to, i want free, i want gone, i want it over. I am hurting so much.
    I wish you understood that all i want is you to be happy and loved. If it cannot be me so be it, but as much as i hurt just no longer being in your life, when i hear you hurt i want to wipe away every tear for you.
    It hurts me. Well i cannot do this, i don’t know how i will work through. Somehow i hope. But i swear to you on that i hold most dear, and you know what that is. I will love you for all eternity. I will be there with no demands but you may ask me anything.
    I am sorry for telling you my true feelings. I am sorry for everything.
    I beg you now to forgive me though i know you don’t come here, i am sorry i love you.

    And god if you listen but once please,please turn this off, i can’t do it, and Angel, you, please be happy, God beyond my needs see to her, see you make her life better than she ever dreamed.
    Let every tear i cried for losing her become a drop of happiness for her.
    Amen

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