I have dreams of you. Every night, you come creeping into my mind like a chill in autumn: so slowly it’s almost unnoticeable, until all of a sudden the whole world is different, and I have just wordlessly accepted the change. How fitting.
We were so close. You actually wanted to be around me. And I ruined everything, because I always do. They’re all right about me.
I wish I had never met you, or at the very least could forget you. I feel so worthless knowing I lost you, and for what?
He might kill me. It’s not as though he hasn’t tried. I don’t even think I care anymore. You used to say I was worth more. Ironically, this – us – has convinced me I got exactly what I deserve. He really is the best I’ll ever get. And it’d he ends me, I’ll deserve that too.
Please just leave me alone. I can’t forget you until you do. You don’t want me anymore, and you never loved me. Stop giving me hope. I don’t have time for people that don’t have time for me, except to take as much as I’ll give, and god knows I can’t stop giving to you, even if u hate myself for it.
I just want to feel whole.